Statehouse Drabbles and Headcanons

I've Been There

Based on some talks with guessimdemons92 and maybe a little projection, as a treat.

TW: Disordered Eating, talks of relapse, Panic

~~

Today's meeting was far different from what they normally were. For one, all of the states were present, the only ones missing were Georgia and Kentucky. Which took a Lot of convincing for several of them, seeing as half the states avoided the meetings when they could. Second, the meeting wasn't being run by DC. Instead, his cousin, Gov, was there.

The states on some level knew that something had happened. It would be hard not to considering DC hadn't been back to the statehouse for over a week, and the main five plus his parents hadn't been for almost half of that time.

As Gov explained the situation, the picture grew clearer.

Iowa's brain got stuck in a loop, repeating the same words. "DC hasn't been eating,".

Iowa knew Illinois kept glancing over at him, as Gov went through some of the steps the family was planning to take, and he couldn't blame him. In fact, as the loop in his head worsened he felt a weight in his chest. Just hearing about it was hard for him. Without thinking Iowa stood up and walked out of the meeting, ignoring the call for him to come back.

He couldn't do this. It was too much.

~~

DC's transition back to the statehouse was... rough. No one really knew what to do, but they were trying their best. Iowa just avoided DC and his partners and family. No one asked about it, if it they noticed it at all.

Iowa's year has already been hard, the last thing he needs is for something to trigger him... again.

However sometimes when you see something, you just know you need to get involved.

Georgia was in the kitchen, making up a plate of food that Iowa immediately recognized as something that would be on DC's treatment plan list. The only problem with this, is that he was obviously putting way more on the plate than would be recommended. That wouldn't help DC at all.

He may not be comfortable getting involved fully, but there was no way he was going to let them accidentally set DC up for a failure this early in his recovery.

"Hey," He says it gently, but firm. "That's for DC right? You're giving him too much."

Georgia startled. "Excuse me?"

Slowly, Iowa walks over to the older state. "You're giving him too much, that portion is way to big." Gently he takes the plate and removes about half of it. "This is more the size he needs."

Georgia is taken aback. "How-... Surely that's not enough!"

Iowa just gives him a soft, sad look. "It's enough for now. I know you want him to gain weight, and just be ok, but that's the right portion for him..." He trails off and looks back at the plate. "If you give him too much, he'll never be able to finish it. And if he can't finish it, or even get close? He'll feel guilty and discouraged."

Georgia is looking at Iowa, a look of disbelief on his face, but is cut off before he can argue any further. "Hey Iowa, you got a sec?" It's Illinois, standing in the door way.

Iowa gives Georgia a sheepish smile. "Gotta go... But... If you need more explanation about it, I could try and go over it later?" and then he's off, out the door with his brother before Georgia can say another word.

~~

Slowly Iowa started helping with DC's recovery. He'd critique the food schedule as needed, help make quite a few of the meals, and make sure the fed was only getting portions that he could actually manage. Everyone was confused as to why he was helping, but they weren't about to turn away an extra set of hands. And considering he was usually accompanied by one of the other Midwest states, usually it was two extra sets.

Though that didn't stop them from asking about it.

They'd learned not to ask when he had another of the Midwest with him - Illinois in particular - as they usually shut down the conversation as soon as it started. Some of them had decided to just leave it. It wasn't worth digging into when they had plenty of other things to do with their time. Some of them though...

"I just don't understand?" Kentucky and Georgia had caught him while he was making food for himself, something that in and of itself gave him anxiety. He tilted his head towards them with a questioning look. Kentucky continued, "I don't understand why you're helping. He didn't... He never called on you. He dropped it whenever it was brought up. What connection do you have that you're helping as much as you are?"

Ah. This again. A small part of Iowa wanted to just tell them. Get it out there and them off his case. But he could never get the words to form. "It's-- I--..." He ducks his head, eyebrows furrowed slightly. "I just... It's for the same reason I know how to help, okay? I'm not- I don't want to talk about it."

And even if they wanted to push it, and get a proper answer, they didn't. Instead they left Iowa in the kitchen alone.

~~

Somewhere along the line, after Iowa had joined in helping with the food aspects of DC's recovery - the part that was hardest for him personally, but that he had the most experience with - Iowa had given in to joining the "watch the fed" schedule. All things considered, it was definitely an easier task for him than being around the food was. Besides, it's not like watching DC was hard, he would mostly just doze on the couch while some reality TV show played as background noise.

There were times however, when it was someone out side his family and polycule with him, that he'd decide to pull out the hard questions.

"Is it always gonna be like this?" The question is soft, if he wasn't paying attention he might not have heard it. "Am I always going to feel this way?"

Iowa knows I isn't really directed at him, DC isn't expecting a real answer... but for once Iowa's words don't catch in his throat. "It'll get better." His voice is firm. "You'll always carry it with you, but it does get better."

DC slowly looks at Iowa and blinks. "How can you be so sure?"

Iowa offers DC a slightly sad smile. "Because I've been where you are right now. You'll get there, and one day, you'll be proud of yourself for how far you've come. It all gets better."

DC's eyebrows furrow slightly, "even... even after... all I've done to my... to my fam-" He ducks his head as he cuts himself off.

The state doesn't respond for a moment. Then he responds in a quiet voice, "they just want to see you get better. The worry that all of them are going through now? It's all worth it to see you recover." Iowa cracks a real smile then, "or at least, that's what I've been told. And I believe them when they say it."

DC just stares at Iowa for a moment, before he leans over and rests his head on the states shoulder. A silent show of trust and thanks.

And if there's the figures of two states in the door way that go unnoticed? Well, no one needs to know. Missouri would pull the fed's dad out before either of them were seen. DC and Iowa would be fine on their own for the moment.