Claw's Bridge(Discontinued)

51. Mirror Thoughts

^Seokjin's POV^

I rested my head against my table. Frustration and exhaustion were slowly eating me alive. I didn't like being a royal, I hated it. I hated how I had to keep a straight face, maintain a monotonous tone and how I had to keep my opinions to myself. I couldn't go to my mates for help, I couldn't burden them with my thoughts. I wanted to spend time with them, but every time I did, all I could think about was the pile up of emotions. I had to be selfless, but I wanted to protect the people I loved.

It was mentally suffocating every time I had to make a decision. Every decision I made either harmed the country or harmed my mates. I wanted to be a better King, I wanted everyone to benefit from my decisions. I didn't care if I alone suffered the consequences, as long as everyone else benefited from it.

"Seokjin?" I heard Yoongi's voice carry through the door followed by a knock. Upon permission, he entered. "I'm here to help you. I won't take no for an answer, you need all the support you can get."

In comparison to my father I was a great King, but in comparison to my grandfather, I was mediocre. The only reason the people respected me is because I was in constant comparison to my father, not my grandfather. I was supposed to be a better King than my grandfather. But there I was, being selfish, being incapable of making a good decision for anyone.

"I can't come up with a loophole," I caved in. I lifted my head from the table and looked at my orange-eyed mate. "Going to war is dangerous for the people, especially Nighter. What if someone breaks into the palace while we're fighting? Nighter is strong, and can fight, but even he knows he won't be able to last long against a transformed dragon. I don't want you to go back there. You will be forced to do things you don't want to, and it will shatter you."

"I've been thinking," Yoongi started. "We can solve one problem right now."

"What?" I urged.

"We can give Nighter powers. We put him through the Royal Transformation," he suggested.

"We don't know if it will work on him. It could kill him. We have no knowledge on what works on his kind, it's too big of a risk. Keep in mind that you need to have your dragon awoken when you're going through the process. Nighter doesn't even have a dragon," I pointed out. We weren't born with an active dragon. Our dragons normally awoke at the age of six.

I bit the inside of my cheeks. Nighter was just another situation where I failed. He was affected by all my decisions. The whole point of the interrogation was to make sure that he was not a threat to the country. The decision to hold the interrogation was made by me for the country, yet he suffered. I called him a murderer to get him to reveal more information. That was what I was trained to do, push the boundaries of the person interrogated to gain information. I hadn't realized how bad the situation got until he walked out of the room. I tried to keep him around us to convince him that mates aren't as bad as he thought. I thought it was good to expose him to the mate bond, but that only resulted in him getting hurt. Regardless of the decision I made, regardless of the intention, Nighter was always the one to get hurt.

I had to change that.

(I wonder if anyone has noticed the connection between the story title and the plot. It's not foreshadowing, I'm just curious. I'll be revealing the connection next chapter anyways.)