Breathless.

Chapter Ten.

Taya

They say when you're about to die, your life flash before your eyes. Weird huh? I saw wonderful times when it was me and my beautiful mother at the park. Swinging side by side, she would constantly tell me how beautiful and smart I am. I miss those days before she got attached to drugs.

I was sleep or in a coma. Honestly I didn't know. I thought I was dead. I didn't care if God would have taken me away today. I was ready whenever he was ready for me. I didn't have a purpose on this planet. So why not die? I wasn't suicidal, but I will constantly have suicidal thoughts that will take upon my mind.

I heard noises in the room. I realize it was Ferg and other people. I kept my eyes close, trying to figure out what they was saying.

"Doc came in yet?" Said a weird voice. I later realize it was Nast.

Everytime I hear his voice it remind me of that day.

"What bitch? Cat got your tongue?" He laughed rubbing on my butt.

I shut my eyes tight, trying to hold in tears.

Should I tell Ferg?

He might think I'm a hoe. I hope Nast doesn't tell him. I was forced so he shouldn't be upset right? I don't know, man. I just really which he didn't forced me to do that to Nast and I wish Nast didn't go along with it either.

"Nah," I heard Ferg say. "Can you watch her real quick? I need to hit up the cafeteria."

"Yeah bro. Go ahead." Nast said. A few seconds later I heard the door close.

"Taya?" He said.

I slowly open my eyes. In front of me was Nast. I looked around the room and saw balloons, flowers, and cards. I checked the clock and it read 5:00 am.

"Um, hi Nast."

"How you feelin'?" He asked, looking at me.

"My sto-stomach hurts." I said nervously. I guess he caught that and he sighed.

"I'm sorry about what went down at Pimp's trap. I shouldn't have never made you do that."

"It's. It's okay." I raised up in the bed a little.

"Nah, it's not. I won't tell Ferg either. He'll probably kill me."

I nod, thanking him in my head.

"Can I ask you a question though?"

"Um sure."

"Why was you hanging with Pimp?"

Before I could even respond, the door swung open. Lauren, Rakim, and Ferg walked in. Ferg locked eyes with me. He put the food on the table and walked over to me.

"You're up." He smiled, making me smile

"Luckily."

"Move back Ferg. Let me see my friend." Lauren pushed Ferg and hugged me.

"I thought I almost lost you." She sniffled, I could feel her tear on my shoulder.

"You crying?" I chuckled.

"Leave me alone." She mumbled leaning up.

"Awe." Nast and Ferg cooed.

I looked around and noticed Rocky quiet. That's not like him.

"What's wrong with him?" I asked Lauren, who got in the bed with me.

"Um he think it's his fault that you got shot." She wiped her eyes.

I looked at him. He held a blank stare on his face.

"Tay, my fault about that shit. I shouldn't have had y'all in that environment." Rocky mumbled.

"It's not your fault, grasshopper."

"She's not goin' to change, huh?" He laughed which made me laugh.

There was a knock on the door. The doctor walked in. He was a tall, dark skin man with a slightly bald head.

"Good morning, Ms. Moore. I'm Dr. Freeman." He sanitize his hands. "How are y'all?"

"Good." They said in unison while he walked over to me.

"Is your mother here?" He asked, which made me twist up my lips.

"Um no sir."

"I have some very important information that needs to be discuss with a family member, parent, or guardian." He exclaimed, looking around the room.

"Sir, we're her family. Her moms at work right now." Rakim spoke.

"Brother?"

"Yeah." Rakim said.

"Well okay. Taya you suffered from bullets going into your lower body causing us to take you into emergency surgery last night. You lost a lot of blood but we got that under control. But I have some bad news." His face soften.

"Okay?"

"You had a miscarriage. We tried everything we could do to save it. I'm so sorry." He stated.

I zoned out as I felt everyone eyes on me.

Miscarriage? I had a child? I was pregnant? I was going to be a mother?

Tears formed into my eyes and slipped down my face. I felt someone cup my face and I looked up to notice Ferg. I saw Lauren beside me with an strange look.

"It's okay Tay." Ferg wiped away my tears.

"I-I have to tell you something." I cried.

"Shh. Not now aight?"

I nod my head as he hugged me and kissed my forehead.

______

"Lunch time, Ms. Taya." A lady said. I open my eyes to see a lady and Ferg fixing my food. I leaned up. The lady left and Ferg wheeled the table over to me.

"Where's Lauren and Rocky?" I asked.

"I sent them to school." He mumbled.

"You hungry?" He asked. I looked up at him and noticed red eyes and bags under them.

"No."

"Well too bad. You gotta eat, baby." He smiled. "Is it possible for yo ass to scoot over?"

"No." I chuckled, lying.

He shook his head and pulled up the chair.

"Eat girl."

"It's nasty. I need some salt."

"Salt's not good for you." I rolled my eyes.

"Do I have to?" I whined.

"Yes. Just eat the burger and pineapples. You'on have to eat them soggy ass fries."

I rolled my eyes and started eating the burger. I ate few bites of it and sat it down.

"I can't eat anymore."

"Well eat them pineapples."

"Ferg, please I don't want to."

He chuckled and open the pineapples, grabbing the plastic fork. He scooped up a few of them and held it to my mouth.

"Open up." He laughed.

I open my mouth and let him fed me some pineapples. He fed me twice until I started complaining again.

"No."

"Aight. Aight." He chuckled. He put the stuff back on the table and wheeled it by the door. He came back and sat on the bed beside me.

"Ferg I really need to talk to you." I said.

"Let's just focus on you gettin' better right now." He replied, leaning on the rail of the hospital bed.

Soon, I'm going to have to reveal who I was pregnant by and why I'm so skeptical of being around Nast. I just hope he don't look at me different after what I say.