𝐇𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐞, 𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭..

Chapter 21

"Lucas." Sykkuno pulled away and whispered testing out whether or not his theory will work.

"Wha-" Corpse said, his eyes opening blearily.

"Lucas." he said louder, looking down at his lap. Once he said it, he felt his breathing get difficult again and felt the burning in his throat, increase. "I knew it."

"You knew what?" Corpse panicked. "Sy, I'm sorry I kissed you- I know you don't like me that way. I just I-"

"Are you fcking kidding me?" Sykkuno scoffed.

"What?" Corpse asked, taken off guard by his accusing tone.

"I'm 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶, Corpse!" Sykkuno could hardly believe that the words were rumbling out of his mouth, but now that they were out they refused to stop. The faucet was turned, the switch was flipped. "I am 𝘴𝘰 desperately and unconditionally in love with you. I love you so much, I can't breathe! You are literally a disease, and you're in me, and I've tried. I've 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥, but I can't get you out. I swear to god, there is no cure for you! You're the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing I think of at night." he cried. "I've tried to keep it to myself, to keep it hidden inside me, to shove it down and move on and forget- forget you! But I can't." Sykkuno was finally overwhelmed with defeat. "I can't, Corpse, and it's literally killing me."

"You love me.. like 𝘪𝘯 love." Corpse whispered. "Then.. why-"

"I can't do this, Corpse! Please just go." Sykkuno begged him, as his thoughts began to swirl. All Corpse ever did was confuse him, he sang with him, he said he loved him, he cared for him, he spent this whole week with him, he kissed him. Yet when he mutters just one name.. It all goes to hell.

"No- wait!" Corpse grasped Sy's hand in his panic. "Please, Sykkuno, I'm so sorry. I know I'm with Lucas and I kissed you and that's so fucked up. I know it's not okay. I mean, I just cheated on him, but fck- I'd do anything for you, I can bre-"

"You love him." Sykkuno cut off his words.

"Pl-"

"Do you love him??" he said more forcefully. He couldn't keep skating around the truth.

"I think, yes-, no, I don't know. I'm just so confused." Corpse said, and he was. And he desperately wished he wasn't. *I guess that's the difference* Sykkuno thought bitterly to himself, *I couldn't be confused about my feelings for him even if I tried.*

"I hate you." Sykkuno said as a single tear streamed down his cheek. Corpse desperately wanted to wipe it away and pull him close, but the cold stare he gave him made him keep his distance.

"We promised the truth." Corpse said, playing with his sleeves again, his heart was heavy and he wanted to be able to tell him just how much he loved him but he couldn't. *Goddammit why couldn't he?*

"That is the truth." Sykkuno said, unflinchingly. "Please.. go."

"Sykkuno-"

"If you've ever loved me, even once, in whatever way.. You'll go."

"We said we wouldn't stop talking, that if we tried we coul-" he was practically begging him.

"I'm not trying to shut you out again," Sy said, "I promise, I just need more time.. go, Corpse."

Corpse hesitated, stood there a while hoping, praying that he could just go back in time to the carnival, before everything got complicated... When they were together and didn't have to worry about who could separate them.. He so desperately wished he could get back to that. But he couldn't. So he left that night, just like he asked of him.