Ours To Be (All Ours, #1)

Chapter 53

I thought I was angry that time I was folding dolma's in the kitchen, heard a bang come from the living room and whipped around to see my father holding my mother in a chokehold, television remote pressed against her cheek as if it were a knife.

I thought I was angry that time I got back into the locker room after gym class and found my clothes in the girl's shower, water running and leaving them to become wet, mushy, and unwearable. I thought I was angry at those bitches for making me walk around school in ugly leggings and a sweaty sport shirt for the rest of the day.

I thought I was angry all my life. In a way, I have been. Not at someone in particular, but at the world. At God. At everyone that's ever done me wrong.

I just never thought I'd have to include the man I love into that list.

What hurts the most is that I've asked him. Asked and asked repeatedly, begged him to tell me what the fuck was going on. Why he wasn't home as much. Why he was so overprotective, treating me as if I was made of porcelain. Why he came home in sour moods. Why he canceled shit last minute. Why he started smoking again. Why why why why. A million fucking times.

Every single response was either a brushoff, distraction, an excuse, or a half-assed promise that one day I'd know, and to just let it go for now.

I did. I don't even fucking know why but like a goddamn idiot, I did.

What he said on the tapes was pure bullshit. That man does have feelings for me. He couldn't have faked that for over five months. Hell, the eight months I've known him. I refuse to believe otherwise.

I just don't understand any of this. Why is Scott threatening him? And why has he never told me that's who he use to work for? Why the fuck were they still in contact and why the fuck did Scott want him back on his team? Practically everyone can sell drugs.

But the biggest question gnawing at my brain is why my boyfriend is such a goddamned liar.

Every time I thought of Kayden, my stomach filled with butterflies and I felt lighter, like he had taken my burdens just like he'd taken my heart. Naturally, fluently. But now, I felt sick to my stomach. His treachery fretted in me like acid poured over an open wound.

The man I thought was the love of my life, making deals with the devil, holding drugs in his hands and his place of freaking work at that, and throwing my name around like some whore he was making me out to be. A bitch that gets his dick wet occasionally. Those words actually came out of his mouth.

I've never wished him anything less than all the best in the world, but right now, as I arrive at the destination he's waiting for me at, tossing my keys at the Valet worker waiting upfront and striding in, I want to make him regret the day he was fucking born.

I identify, and when the bouncer spots my name on his list, he nods curtly and moves aside to let me through.

Kayden is waiting for me exactly where he said he would. By the balcony, considering that'd be the easiest spot for me to find in this building.

He's on his phone, scrolling, probably through Instagram out of boredom, but his gaze tips up when I get closer, as if he could feel me in his atmosphere.

The biggest smile breaks out across his face the moment our eyes meet, and for one short second, my heart clamps painfully at the fact that I'm going to crush that smile and smash it into little pieces in a minute. And then it feels like it may burst in my chest when I realize this might be the last time I see that smile if he doesn't have a damn good explanation for what I found out in the last hour.