Chapter 36

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Super freaking short, but it's been a while and I wanted to get some sort of an update up for you guys.

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Lauren decides it was best to hold off on going to work for a little while. Camila's panic attack was one of the reasons she'd made that decision; but it was also because she still had some residual anxiety over the fact she was one one who had caused it in the first place.

No it hadn't happened again, and yes she had admittedly been okay over the past few days since the incident, but despite that, she still feels as though this was the best choice for the both of them.

At least for now.

She couldn't help but think this whole thing had done a full one eighty though. Lauren had been brought in all those months ago to help Camila with her anxiety and mental health; to help her cope and come up with better and safer coping mechanisms, but she feels as though she was having a reverse effect on her because it was seeming as though Camila was only getting worse.

Maybe other aspects had improved. Like her want to harm herself; her self deprivation issues and her lack of sleep and insomnia, but her anxiety most definitely hadn't and she only had herself to blame for that.

She shouldn't have gotten so attached; made Camila so dependant on her. But it had happened, and despite the issues it had caused she knew she wouldn't change it for the world because the girl was so incredibly important to her. She loved her, a whole lot and she didn't even want to imagine what life would be like without her.

She makes it a mental note to work on it with Camila. See if they could find any thing that would help.

Bringing herself out of her thoughts, she looks down at Camila who currently fast asleep in her arms. It was eight in the morning, and she herself had only been awake for about twenty or so minutes thanks to the sun glaring at her through the curtains she'd obviously forgotten to close last night.

She brings her hand down to the girl nestled against her bare chest; something she'd taken to doing so Camila didn't have to wake her up should she want to nurse throughout the night -which she did more often than not- thumb grazing over the soft skin of her cheek and lingering ever so slightly just above her cheek bone.

Camila stirs slightly, eyebrows furrowing at the disruption to her sleep and whilst she doesn't wake up, she does search for her mother's breast, lips making an unconscious suckling motion as her head moves slightly to the left. Lauren smiles gently as she adjusts her, and in her sleep the girl latches on and begins to suckle softly causing the mother to shake her head fondly.

The girl was about as obsessed as you could get when it came to her boobs and milk. But she supposes it was like that with any toddler/baby.

Sighing contently, she leans down to press a kiss to Camila's forehead. The girls eyes do flicker open then, and although very confused at first at her current position, she doesn't pull away and instead readjusts her latch so she could drink properly, eyes, although droopy, staring up in awe at her mama.

"Did you sleep okay?" Lauren questions softly, and Camila bobs her head in confirmation behind her breast, "Good. I'm glad. You and mama are just going to have a lazy day today. How does that sound?" She wonders, hands clasping together at the small of her back.

Camila removes her hand from her other breast and gives the mother a thumbs up. Lauren playfully shakes her head and decides to let the girl finish nursing before she asks her anymore questions that would require any talking, but does give her small body a squeeze in acknowledgment to her silent answer along with a kiss to the forehead.

About half an hour later she was done, and Lauren helps her unlatch before sitting them both up, "Bath or shower?" She wonders, sliding out of the bed and easing the girl back onto her back so she could remove her wet diaper before it gave her a rash.

Camila bites her bottom lip in deliberation for a second as she watches her mother undo the tapes of her diaper, pulling it out from beneath her and rolling it up, "Shower mama. Rain." She murmurs after a few moments of thinking.

Lauren smiles as she hauls the girl back up onto her feet and takes her hand, "I think that's a good choice." She comments, leading her through to the bathroom.

"With you mama?" The girl wonders, free hand rising to get mouth.

Lauren stops it before it could reach its destination, not wanting the girl to suck her thumb when she'd yet to wash her hands, "Sure baby. But I have to wash my hair so you'll have to play like a good girl for a little longer than you normally would." She reaches around the glass door and turns on the shower, tossing a few toys from the tub into the tiled floor.

Camila immediately nods her head, not really caring how long she had to play so long as she could to be close to her mama.

The mother checks the temperature of the water before tugging off her shorts, and after she'd done the same with Camila, but with her shirt as opposed to her pants considering she wasn't wearing any, she guides them both under the stream of water.

She couldn't have it as hot as she normally would as last time Camila had complained that it was too hot, so she tries not to cringe as the cool water envelopes her body and instead focuses on getting them both clean.

"Mama?" Camila asks as she was guided to stand straight underneath the shower head, eyes tightly closed to avoid getting any water in them as she feels her mother's hands comb through her hair to make sure it was fully saturated.

Lauren smiles as she reaches for the shampoo and pulls open the cap, "What is it baby?" She squeezes a decent amount onto her hand before beginning to scrub the girls scalp, free hand on the back of her neck to keep her still as she had a tendency to squirm impatiently claiming that, mama, you're taking too long!

"When can I meet Dinah?" The girl wonders, reaching up to grasp the woman's forearm to keep her balance when she feels herself move again.

Lauren shrugs, "I suppose we could invite her around tomorrow, if she's not busy with Normani or anything else." She replies, reaching for the conditioner and applying it to the length and ends of the girls hair.

She couldn't believe in the whole nine months she'd had Camila, she and Dinah had never once met. Oh well. They hopefully will tomorrow and maybe after that it could become a regular occurrence. Maybe she could even stay with Dinah when she eventually went back to work.

Camila smirks softly at the mention of Normani, an action of which Lauren notices and couldn't help but mimic, but before she could comment on it, the girl quickly jumps onto a completely different topic.

The lion king.

She couldn't help but roll her eyes fondly as she washes out the conditioner.

**

Make sure to vote if you wanna se the next chapter! (That probably won't be published for a another month 😳)

Anyways I hope you enjoyed this little fluffy chapter!

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