~Chapter 10~

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The second you closed your eyes, you fell asleep. Everything around you was just too much. The way you had crawled into a ball, was unlike any way you usually slept, but it seemed to comfort you.

And soon enough, you were back awake. The sun shone through the window in your room, the rays exposing the little pieces of dust floating around. You sat up on your futon, and blankly stared out of the window. 

"School. Do I really have to go?" you whispered to yourself. 

Hoping to get it over with, you got up, got dressed in your room, and grabbed your school bag. You headed towards your door. Holding the knob as you hesitated to open it. You rested your head on the door for a quick second before opening the door. 

Thankfully, no one was up yet. It was just you. Walking slowly towards the front door, you grabbed an apple. You were hungry, but didn't feel like eating an actual meal. This was enough for now.

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" L/n F/n" your homeroom teacher called. 

"Here." you said meekly. Your teacher continued to call attendance, right as the first bell rang. And right as that happened, the classroom slammed open, to a messy Kyo. He looked like he had just woken up. He was out of breath, and he had bed head. 

"What are you staring at?" he glared at the fellow students around you. He went to his seat, that was located next to you, and sat down. You took a quick glance at him. Hoping he wouldn't notice you. 

Kyo had his head down on the desk, paying no mind to anything around him. There were quite a few girls around the room, whispering to each other, probably about Kyo, or our schools "prince," Yuki. 

The day went on like usual. You took down notes when you needed too, glanced around the room a couple of times and tried to stop your stomach from making any loud noises in the middle of class, which seemed almost impossible. 

You waited and waited for the lunch bell to ring. And it seemed like an hour was more like a year. But then finally, the bell rang. The teacher dismissed your class, everyone practically running towards the cafeteria. 

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As you headed towards your usual lunch spot on the roof of the school, you passed by Tohru, and her 2 female friends. You weren't in the mood to stop and chat, so you tried to just walk on passed them. But that, obviously, didn't work. Tohru grabbed you by the sleeve and stared at you right in the eyes. A look of anxiety seemed to wash away when she saw your face. 

You were confused. Was she worried about me?  You questioned to yourself. 

"Oh, I'm glad to see your looking better!" Tohru exclaimed, as she let go of your sleeve. 

"Yeah, I'm feeling much better, now that I've gotten some rest." you said, hiding yourself behind a mask. 

But in reality, you weren't "feeling better," in fact, you felt much worse. On the outside everything may have seemed fine, but deep down, your heart was aching, and your mind was trying so hard to try and stop you from running away from everything. Sometimes, you felt like you couldn't even breath, like you were being suffocated by your own mind and actions. 

You just wanted to leave. To run away, to somewhere know one knew you. A place were you could get a fresh start. 

But that would always be another thing you wanted that was too much to as for. 

You knew that you could never leave. 

And Kyo was one of the reasons why. 

Even if he didn't love you back. The sheer amount of love you had for him by yourself, was enough for two. 

Even if you couldn't get the happy ending you wanted, just being close to him was enough, for now at least.

There were times were you thought you wanted more. More from him. And more from yourself. 

But there was absolutely no way you could ask that of him.

Even though he had agreed to go out on a date with you. Even though you wanted it. The was absolutely no guarantee that there would be more afterwards. You were uncertain that there was even a possibility. 

But, if the two of you did end up going out on a date. One, single, date. That would make you happy. You weren't certain if you could do it, but, sometimes you tried to convince yourself that this one date, would be enough. 

That it would be enough to help you get over him. To help you move on. Or at least, to keep the memory of him and you alive in your heart, and maybe even his.  

The thought sometimes slipped into your mind, from time to time. 

If I go out with Kyo, just once, he'll have a memory of me and him, one that he could keep in his heart forever. 


To be continued...


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