Don't Want To See You In The Next Life (Volume1)

Chapter 110

Someone passed by and looked back at them curiously. The assistant who stood by like a light bulb cleared his throat and said with a smile: "Boss, Xia Er Shao, it is not convenient to talk here. Should we go back to the room first?"

Song Yan's room was messed up before and he did not have enough time to clean it up. The assistant went out of the room and guarded the door idly.

Inside the closed door, Xia Lin sat on the sofa and stared at Song Yan silently. Song Yan lowered his eyes, not daring to look at Xia Lin. 

The two were in a stalemate for a long time then Xia Lin said, "Song Yan, are you not going to say something to me?"

Song Yan looked at him cautiously: "What do you want to...know?" 

Xia Lin said helplessly: "You don't know what to say so let me talk about it. In fact, the reason I came to the United States this time is to come and see you."

Song Yan looked at him in surprise. Xia Lin's voice was softer than he expected but the gentle Xia Lin made him feel more at a loss than the angry Xia Lin.

Xia Lin continued: "Song Yan, I haven't spent much time with you in this life but in the previous life, I spent time with you day and night. Do you think that if you find a body double to fool me, you can hide it seamlessly?"

Song Yan was stunned for a moment then saw Xia Lin holding one of his hands, raising his cuffs to expose his elbows, and said, "Look for yourself."

Song Yan twisted his elbow with some effort and found a mole on his outer elbow. If it hadn't been Xia Lin showing it to him, he might not have noticed it all his life. Some of the poses are of them standing with their sleeves rolled up.

Song Yan smiled bitterly: "Sure enough, I can't hide anything from your eyes." 

"Before I came, I had accumulated a lot of questions and wanted to ask you." 

Xia Lin supported his forehead tiredly. There was uncontrollable fatigue between his brows, "But after seeing you, I suddenly didn't want to ask anything. . " 

Song Yan said bitterly: "Xia Lin..."

"Since you have been in the United States, you have never actively contacted me. I am really happy for you but I did not expect that you would use this way to perfuse me..."

"No," Song Yan said anxiously, "Xia Lin, listen to me..."

"Song Yan, I have always had the same nightmare for three years. I dreamt that you died in the cave like that. No matter what I say, you can't hear me. I always wake up from this nightmare and I can not fall asleep all night. I really hope you can get better soon and return to your normal life as soon as possible. "

When Xia Lin said this, he shook his head slightly and a self-deprecating smile appeared at the corner of his mouth: "But until now, I didn't know that I had been doing unnecessary things. You already have your own ideals and ambitions. The layout is much broader and bigger than I thought. Even if you have inconvenient legs, you can still do well in different fields. It seems that I am...too constrained by personal gains and losses."

When he said this, he lowered his eyes, as if suppressing a certain emotion.

When he raised his eyes again, he smiled: "But that's okay. Although it's a bit regretful that you haven't been able to regain your health . . . it is a good thing that you can find the value of your life. Don't worry, I will not ask you about your physical condition again and you don't have to bear any more burdens."

He paused, stood up, and said, "That's all I want to say. I'm leaving now." 

"Xia Lin!" 

Seeing that the other party turned to leave, Song Yan wanted to grab Xia Lin's hand in a hurry but because of his instability, he went straight forward and fell down.

Xia Lin's footsteps stopped and when he turned around, he wanted to lean over to help but Song Yan grabbed his ankle.

Song Yan didn't care about his embarrassed appearance at the moment. He dragged his stumped leg forward, clung to one of Xia Lin's legs, raised his head, and whispered like a child: "Xia Lin, I was wrong, I was wrong. Don't go."

Xia Lin didn't expect that he would be in such a humble posture. He was stunned for a moment and was about to say something when he caught a glimpse of Song Yan's hand that had been hidden in his sleeve revealing a bandage. At this moment, because of excessive force, blood gradually oozed from the bandage.

He wanted to lean over to check Song Yan's wound. When he moved, he was immediately hugged by Song Yan with greater strength, as if he was afraid that if he didn't pay attention, Xia Lin would disappear before his eyes.

Xia Lin was a little helpless and persuaded, "Song Yan, let go, I..."

But Song Yan anxiously explained: "Xia Lin, I'm not trying to perfuse you, nor feel that it is a burden. I just... don't know how to face you. I know you care about me but your care will let me fall. I deceived you, alienated you, avoided you, just to cut off my thoughts."

Song Yan continued, "Actually, I don't have the grand ideals and ambitions you mentioned. My wish is very simple. I hope you can live a good life. Over the years, I have been telling myself to learn to let go and give you freedom but as long as I see you with others, I get mad with jealousy. Xia Lin, you don't know how much I miss you. I miss you every day and night. I read every message you sent several times. I will record every word you say and listen to it before falling asleep every night."

Xia Lin was startled: "What did you say?"

Song Yan realized that he had accidentally run his mouth and hesitated for a moment before he said: "You only call me on New Year's Eve every year. I secretly recorded the sound and listened to it repeatedly on the phone, closing my eyes to imagine you by my side."

"Xia Lin, I have no cure. For the past three years, I have lived in purgatory on earth every day after leaving you. I missed you like crazy but life is better than death. Xia Lin, what should I do? Tell me what should I do..." 

In the end, he was choked and almost speechless.

Xia Lin was stunned for a moment. As if being evoked by those long-distance memories in the depths of his memory, his gaze flicked across the deep night outside the window. His eyes flickered slightly and his eyes were full of sadness.

After a while, he sighed almost inaudibly. He forced himself to put away his sadness then leaned over and helped Song Yan up. 

His voice was calm: "This time, I came to the United States and insisted on seeing you for the last time--"

Before Xia Lin could finish speaking, he caught a glimpse of his mobile phone on the table. It suddenly lit up and a text message was displayed on the screen.

【Xia Lin, the re-examination result came out. It is indeed VHL syndrome. Taking advantage of the early control of the disease, you must actively cooperate with the treatment. Please contact me as soon as possible after returning from the United States. 】

(VHL Syndrome: Von Hippel-Lindau syndrome is a hereditary condition associated with tumors arising in multiple organs. VHL-related tumors include hemangioblastomas, which are blood vessel tumors of the brain, spinal cord, and retina.)