his good girl

twenty nine

How to waste your time in the most painful way possible.

It's been nine days since Luis Pierce and i broke up.

He hasn't been in school, but i've been texting Layton every couple hours to make sure he's eating properly, which thankfully he has.

I wanna see him, but i don't wanna give him the wrong idea. I haven't forgotten. And i don't think i'll ever forgive him. I can't.

It's 9pm and i'm finishing my spanish homework. I didn't go to the detention on Monday since i left school earlier, and Ms Garcia is gonna murder me, but that's the last thing on my mind right now to be frank.

I also have math and chem homework, but i left those in my bag. Out of sight out of mind i'd like to call it.

My phone buzzes, but i ignore it.

In all honesty i need to turn my phone off; i should not be taking this long on homework for a language that i already speak. Quite embarrassing.

My phone buzzes again and i tut, picking it up.

im outside -L

I raise my eyebrows. I'm pretty surprised he left the house.

Why? I type back before putting my phone back down on the bed.

It buzzes again and i sigh.

i need to see you. -L

Huffing, i throw my phone back down, grabbing a hoodie and leaving my room.

I slip my feet into my crocs as i pull the door open, looking up at the black jeep in my driveway.

Luis is lying back, his eyes closed. He looks perfect.

I walk around to the other side, pulling the car door open. He lolls his head to the side as i take a seat, slowing opening his eyes.

"Hey." he says quietly.

"Hi."

"How are you?"

"What is it Luis?" i sigh.

His eyes on mine becomes too intense, and i turn to look out the window.

"I'm sorry Devyn." he breathes.

"Sorry isn't good enough." i say simply.

"None of it was fake. I liked you from the start."

I turn to look at him now.

"But when i realised i was in love with you... it scared me." he runs a hand through his hair. "It was such a stupid thing to do. She just came on to me and i didn't resist."

"It's fine."

Luis looks at me, his brows furrowed.

"No it's not Dev-"

"Some things just aren't meant to be." i smile at him softly.

A tear slides down his cheek and wipe it with the pad of my thumb.

"Do you remember what i said before all of this? Don't look for any redeeming qualities in me. And that's all you do Dev. You're so good for me and i ruined everything."

I'm glad he's self aware.

I close my eyes, letting the tears i've been pushing back make their way down my cheeks.

"I'm so sorry Dev. I never wanted to hurt you."

"We should go our separate ways Luis. It's for the best." i press my lips together.

He nods slowly, looking back up. "Friends?"

I shake my head and his face drops.

"We could never just be friends. You know that." i laugh and he nods, tears falling down his face.

I cup his face as i lean forward, and i press my lips againt his. His smell, taste, the softness of his lips against mine warm my heart. But i have to pull away.

"I love you." i whisper, pressing our foreheads together.

His eyes widen in shock, before his whole face crumbles.

"I love you." Luis husks.

I pull away, opening the car door and stepping out. I walk into my house, not stopping to look back before i close the door behind me.