ENTIRELY HIS (K.th ff)

Nightmares

I changed into my pjs. I ate left over pizza for dinner before flopping down on the sleeper couch in my little living room. I was unsettled, Brian touching me had brought me back to a place I had been trying to escape for six years. The intention was to watch a movie on t.v. but I slept off twenty minutes into the movie.

I retreated back till I fell on the bed flat on my back. I felt a heavy weight on me and unsteady breathing. My own breathing become uneven, panic rising from the pit of my stomach.
"Get off from me!" I yelled at the top of my voice trying to shove him off me. He gripped my hands tightly pinning them to my side.
"You don't have to do this," I whispered hoping he'd grow a conscience. This wasn't the man I had fallen for.
"Wesley please! Don't do this!" I wiggled my hands out of his grip and used all my energy to push him off me. That was a fruitless attempt, he held my hands tighter on my sides.
"Don't fight it! It's gonna hurt more if you do!" He growled. He attacked me with a kiss, I looked away and he kissed my jawline instead. Tears welled in my eyes, i let them fall giving up. He was going to do it and I wouldn't be able to stop him.
I felt my sweat pants together with my panties slide off me. He forcefully parted my legs accommodating himself between them.
"Please," I begged silently. He locked his lust filled eyes with mine. His were darker, squinted and ready to devour me. This wasn't how I had imagined my first time.
"I'm going to make you feel good," he whispered in my ear planting a kiss on my neck. I cried some more before the most excruciating pain erupted from my lady part. I screamed in pain but he didn't stop, he pushed himself deeper into me tearing my walls as he did. He groaned thrusting harder into me. I closed my eyes trying to locate the happiest moments in my life. My imagination brought me to the day I got the acceptance letter into my high school. I was so happy I cried. As happy as that memory was, it still failed to take away the pain I was currently going through. I felt every inch of him destroying my womb. I couldn't take it anymore, I closed my eyes slowly escaping into nothingness.

"Mel! Mel!" I heard a faint voice calling my name, I couldn't answer. I was still struggling to get away from Wesley.
"Please no. Get off me," I mumbled in my sleep until I felt someone shake me lightly. I awoke with a start gripping my heart. I looked around and my eyes landed on Brian, I screamed retreating into a safe corner.
"Hey, I'm not going to hurt you. It's just me," he said softly. He approached me and my back hit the wall leaving me completely stuck. He kept coming before engulfing me in a bone crushing hug. Since Wesley, I had never been that close to any male.

A few minutes later, I eased up and rested my head on his chest. I was overwhelmed with emotion. All of the pain I had been bottling up inside came out in flash floods of tears. I cried and he just held me letting me cry out my pain. I held on to his coat. After almost half an your of my break down, he sat me down, my hands in his.

"Who broke you like this?" He asked softly.
"I... h-his name is Wesley," I choked on incoming tears.
"What did he do? Hit you?"
"He raped me,"
"What?" He asked, his forehead creasing in what could only be anger. I explained how Wesley and I had started dating, how he was five years older than me. How he demanded sex and how I couldn't give him that cause I was not ready. And lastly how he took away my innocence by force.

"Did you tell anyone?"
"I couldn't. It hurt so bad that I still cared for him even though that wasn't mutual. My parents were strict about me being friends with boys so telling them I had been raped was out of question,"
"At least tell me you sought medical help?"
"I did. I wasn't infected and I wasn't pregnant either."
"Who else knows about this?"
"Only you and me and Wesley of course."
"So you kept this to yourself, letting the pain have its way with you? It's okay to ask for help Mel, you don't always have to be strong all by yourself,"
"What if I get hurt again?"
"I understand your fear but being positive helps too," he pointed out, "I'm here for you okay?"
"Okay,"
"I know it's  hard to trust anyone right now but I just want to be a friend nothing more," he assured me.
"Really?"
"Yeah, I'm engaged," he waved his hand in my face, "It's just that I've been watching you, you seemed to be struggling so I just wanna be friends."
"Thank you," I said honestly, "How did you get here though?"
"Oh I came to pick you up for work, asked around for your apartment number and I came to knock. You didn't answer and I could hear you crying so I broke down the door. Don't worry I'll pay for it," he said.
"Thank you so much," he hugged me again and let go.
"I need a favour though," he said.
"Anything,"
"I have a new online student, he wants to learn the language on a daily. I only offer Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays since my schedule is tight. I have way too many students now so I can't tutor him everyday," I listened attentively waiting for where and when i came in.
"Could you please tutor him?"
"What? Brian! I told you I'm not a good tutor already,"
"Please Mel, I don't want to let him down," he gave me puppy eyes his ocean blue eyes charming me, "You can charge him extra, the money is all yours. When I clear my schedule I'll take up from where you left off, Please."
"Okay fine, you better clear that schedule fast then cause I didn't sign up for tutoring,"
"Thank you, thank you, thank you," he said kissing my tiny hands. "I'll send you his details and also give him yours."

I just rolled my eyes. Now what?