I didn't take my meds today.
Two days ago Caitlin Adams asked if I was bipolar because I was into her on Monday but by Friday I had figured out that she was too demanding.
But those words, that question... it seeped into my soul and tarnished my tho...
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ICE CUBES liquefied in Jamie's limeade, I swished them around the cup wondering why he left me holding his drink.
The air was a sauna, the kind of heat that doesn't invoke calm, rather an irritable rage. Dust gathered on the tops of cars, illuminated by the sun shining throughout the parking lot and the Earth cracked under the dryness of a late April day. It was metaphorical for how I was feeling. Cracked. Or in the very least cracking up.
I waited.
And then I waited some more.
Arlo never replied to the message, he never even addressed it in person. He ignored it and he ignored me. So I gave up waiting.
Realistically I knew he wasn't throwing his casual hookups in my face, that wasn't who he was but it didn't stop me from craving his attention more and more. My time was running short and I didn't want to leave things like this.
People swarmed the school parking lot like a cluster of wasps. Buzzing around with excitement and stress. I leaned against one of the stationary busses, just watching condensation clog on the outside of a Perspex tumbler, ignoring the chaos unfold all around me.
"Fearne heads up!" Jamie threw a soccer ball at me and I raised my arms in alarm to shield myself from it, the ice clanged against the cup and the liquid splattered all over me with my sudden movement.
"You're supposed to catch." He laughed.
"Fucking idiot!"
Zaks convertible pulled up in one of the vacant parking spots, Jordan following closely behind. Their loud music captured the attention of every single person waiting to get on the bus.
"Oh no not Justin Bieber." Jamie enclosed his face with his hands and I laughed. The guys all serenaded along to the chorus at the top of their lungs, dancing with their hands and directing their shame towards Jamie. He leaned over his dad and cut off the radio.
"I'm not riding with you guys, no chance. I'd rather take the bus. You're all so fucking embarrassing."
"You cut me deep." Liam joked.
"Where is Arlo?" I stopped breathing. I realised I just froze at the mere mention of his name but hopefully it went unnoticed.
"He's with umm..." he pointed his finger around his neck "that guy... umm" his clouded mind couldn't think of his name but my brain screamed it louder than the music they were just playing. "the douchey one with the chain."
"Carlton." Jamie helped.
"Yeah that's the one. He should be here any minute." That was my cue.
"I'm gonna go get cleaned up." I pointed at the green sticky stain on my shirt.
The school hallways were unusually empty for twelve o'clock on a Monday afternoon, even the creepy janitor wasn't about.
