THOSE SUMMER NIGHTS

[23]

[23]

- EDEN -

-

AFTER A SHORT walk to town, I had realized that, indeed, I had no idea where I was taking him. I wasn't lost, but I was nearly there.

We were in the small town next to the house. Small shops lined each side of the street. The sunrise hung behind the town like it had been suspended in time. Not a whisper could be heard except for the crashes of the waves against the shore a few feet away. This town looked to be straight out of a movie.

I looked up at Atlas who was taking in the scene around him. When he finally looked down, I smiled. I don't know why it was, but he was... nothing like I've ever felt. He was like a haven... Even if he wasn't my haven, he still made me feel safe.

A small frown made its way to my lips. Not yours...

"What's wrong?" Atlas asked, a frown that matched mine, resting on his face.

I shook my head, shaking myself from my thoughts as well, "Nothing. I just—"

I took a breath and pointed to a small restaurant, "You wanna eat?"

He looked towards the area I was pointing at and nodded, "Yeah, sure."

I made my way towards the restaurant, Atlas following a few feet behind me. When the waitress sat us down at a table by the window showcasing the town to us, I let out a breath, letting my thoughts overtake me.

As I stared at Atlas, I found myself wanting to curl up and hide away from those beautiful eyes. It's as if every time I looked into his eyes, he could see and feel everything it was I was thinking and feeling. It scared me that someone could read me so easily. Usually, I liked it when nobody knew what I was thinking. I liked being able to curl up in the thoughts in my head knowing that no one would know what they were

But now... Now, it was like he was there with me. Looking through every crevice and shelf in my overcrowded head. I hated it, but I love it too.

I loved it because maybe trying something new like this was good. It was like breaking an invisible rule that I had been enforcing on myself for years. It was like a sign that read Authorized Personnel Only was slapped onto my forehead, making it basically impossible for any person to walk through. Any person but Atlas, who seemed to not care about the rules and walls I had put up.

I don't know when it had become alright for me to spill every little thought that came to mind to him. A simple Tell me about home was all it took for me to tell him about my life. I didn't just tell him about my life, I told him about what I liked, my old pets, my parents— everything!

What the fuck was wrong with me?

It was like he had told me that night behind that bar. That night had told me that, in fact, he did know everything it was I was feeling and wanted. He had told me that I looked for a person to love and confide in every person I met. He was right. I was a horrible person for that, right? That was a fucked up thing to want and think. I had people to confide in. I was just being a fucking selfish bitch. I wanted more, like always. I was never satisfied.

I was thrust back into reality when the waitress walked up to our table and asked us if we were ready to order. Atlas told her that he'd have some sort of breakfast sandwich thing and I sat there like an idiot not knowing what I wanted to eat. The waitress sat there through the whole thing and let me finally stutter out my order. I eventually settled on the same thing Atlas was having and asked for four more of that to-go. I couldn't speak to people when I really needed it. I hated myself so much sometimes.