Love Me Never

14| Tragedy

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Tragedy

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Chapter 14: Tragedy (Rhys' POV)

We both gave up on the wedding vows when nothing came to mind and took a break. I grabbed two wine glasses from the bar and opened a brand new bottle, pouring us a glass each. 

She sat on the windowsill, staring at the gazebo through the glass. "Why are you exchanging the ring?" she questioned. 

"Because this one isn't yours. You don't want it anyway." 

She frowned, taking the glass from me. 

"I don't want that stupid ring," I quoted. "Ring a bell?" 

"Well, I didn't..." she trailed off with a huff, taking a sip of the wine. 

"It's a nice ring, is all," she mumbled. 

"It is," I agreed, "and you like it. But you don't love it. You won't be loving me, you should at least love your ring. I'll buy you a new one, don't worry." 

She narrowed her eyes, scrutinizing me. "Are you sick or something?" 

I rolled my eyes, sitting down beside her. "Aren't you being dramatic?" 

"Aren't you being weird? This is the first time in three years that you're behaving... decent. It always feels like you're trying to—" She caught herself. 

I knew she was going to say but I needed to hear her say it. "Trying to?" 

She let out a breath. "Do we have to do this?" 

"I think it's high time. Don't you?" 

She stared at me for a minute before shrugging. "It always feels like you're trying to hurt me." 

That's because I've always been trying to. 

After I came back home yesterday, I thought a little more- actually, that's not the right phrase- I dwelled and obsessed over Ava Robinson the way I did as a teen. I was completely in love with her, head over heels. I wanted nothing more than to be with her for the rest of my life and I was so fucking sure of it. She was a kid, but I wasn't. We had rules to follow, laws to abide by, and we did. And I think it's because we didn't rush anything that I fell in love with her as hard as I did. 

And then I looked at the way I treat her and behave with her now and... What the hell am I doing? What am I even trying to do? Before our marriage came about, I had to ensure she hated me. She had to, because if she didn't hate me and I didn't pretend to hate her, then we would fall in love all over again. And if that happened, people would easily figure out that we've been together longer than we would let on. And then we'd both be in more trouble than anybody could imagine. I can't afford rumors or scandals right before I'm crowned king. 

But we're getting married. How are we supposed to survive a hateful marriage? Marriages don't last when the two partners despise each other. And now that I've successfully made her hate me, I have to undo it. Because I can't stand the hostility between us anymore and I can't stand not loving her any longer. I wish I could say we were just pretending but we're not because love fades. 

Nobody says it, but it's true, and love fades unless you keep feeding it to grow. If you don't water it, the flower doesn't bloom. If you stop watering an already grown, bloomed flower, then it dies. Our love is as good as dead. And you need some sort of love to make a marriage work. Understanding is love, compromise is love, friendship is also love. We have nothing between us any longer. And we need to build it back up.