With Love, Ryan (Shattered#1)

.25

| Eleanor |

And then it happened.

Not sex, silly.

Yesterday , we had a make out session at the library because your gal was feeling rebellious and quite . .on.

This beautiful man was turning me into a person I was slowly gaining access too. Each time he touched me, a different Eleanor would unlock.

The feisty Eleanor.

The kinky Eleanor.

The moody Eleanor.

Different shades of me! All because of one man!

And then it happened.

I had to study but he visited me and well, who cared about books when you had a hot man all to yourself?

The place I had occupied was hidden, secluded. And things turned from "I missed you" to full blown kissing.

I had been thinking about asking him to talk to me in a mouth to mouth way.

We couldn't get enough of each other!

He was driving me mad!

Poor Willow! I had been ruthless to her by judging her state.

Just when I shifted from his lips to his jaw, you know peppering kisses all along his jawline and then suddenly he pulled back, wincing!

Shutting his eyes and wincing. .his thumb feeling for his jaw and I felt like blowing up from sheer embarrassment.

Did I went in too rough?

He had told me multiple of times how rough I was . .how demanding I could get.

"What is it?" Breathless, I tried to look at his jaw while he shook his head in a mild nothing.

Like hell I would believe that!

Being the stubborn person I was, I squatted his hand away and sucked in my breath . .his jaw was purple!

It had a purple blotch on it!

Like he got punched or—

My stomach turned over.

"Ryan, what the hell?" I held him by the chin, not allowing him to move.

He was hurt!

My Ryan had been hurt!

Quickly, his hand wrapped around my wrist—gently pulling it away from his face.

"Nothing , alright? I had a rough patch with my fridge." He smiled , those blue eyes earnest.

For a moment I kept watching his face.

"Fridge don't make you go purple." I stated , my eyes not wavering from the bruise.

Ryan sighed softly, fingers sliding into mine, palm to palm.

"Last night , I went in to make a sandwich and I was dead sleep. The door got me in the jaw." He shrugged carelessly.

I felt so freaking stupid because I wanted to cry.

And do stupid shit like kiss it or something. .

But then the cringe level would be too high for me.

"I don't like the idea of you getting hurt so tonight I'mma destroy the fridge." I said , leaning towards him. .my thigh pressed beside his. .my head laying on his shoulder.

He chuckled lightly.

"Be my guest. Also getting hurt is inevitable." He said softly.

That didn't settle well with me.

"It so isn't! One should protect himself against hurricane hurt. Not talking about the stupid fridge.  . I mean grown up crap."

"I know but sometimes you get stuck in an environment you can't escape from." His voice was low and I knew right then he was talking about his past but his voice was steady.  .as if he had healed.

"What. .what did you do when you got stuck?" I couldn't help but ask.

He stayed silent for a minute , collecting his thoughts. .words. Everything.

I felt as if whatever he told me wasn't the actual brutal version. He would always water it down. Make it more digestible for me. .

"Being stuck is being thrown onto a battlefield I wasn't prepared for. It's ruthless. It doesn't care if you're a kid or an adult. You can't ask for help. You can't turn your back and. .," He paused ," every human has a survival mode intact. Build in. It activates when things turn down. I did what I could at the cost of losing my brother."

Now his voice turned low, forlorn and I knew right then he would never heal from it.

"Why don't you hound his ass? Tell him your side of story?" I bit my lower lip, my heart sad for him.

"He knows everything. One day forgiveness would find its away." He turned at me, kissing the crown of my head.

"He better or I'll kick his existence right back to where it belongs." I muttered darkly. Not at all liking his bratty brother.

But I could understand him somehow. .

I had a broken relationship with my mother and I could feel what he had to go through.

Maybe , broken people recognize broken people.

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And a naive little me thought that was the end of it.

Nope.

The next day , a mysterious bruise appeared right beside his cheek.

He had his hood up in a bid to hide it from my eyes but when you're kissing?

There's no way you can hide anything.

Straddling him, I had once again the smacked face look.

He had the same expressions.

The same reaction.

Shutting his eyes, wincing.

After two minutes of him soothing the bruise while I straddled him with my arms crossed. .he glanced at me.

"What? Did the door tried to kiss you now?" My voice was dry and I had a feeling. .if I didn't get out of here . .someone might lose his life.

Because it hit me.

He lied to me.

One hand over his cheek, his blue eyes tried to do the trick on me.

Smouldering and trying to change the topic but I was off him in a second.

He sat up straighter on the couch while I made a bun out of my hair, my hands shaking a little.

"Eleanor, I can explain—,"

I whirled around at him, my eyes blazing.

"Shut. It. Down!!"

He opened his mouth to protest—

"You lied to me!" I snapped. " You can't go lying around to the person you claim to be in love with! It makes me question everything you said to me!"

He raised his hand in calm down manner.

"Its not a big deal—,"

"The hell it is, Ryan! You have got a big fat bruise on your face and it's not a big deal?!" I was freaking out on him.

Beyond pissed, I grabbed my bag and didn't let him get to me. Going straight for the door, I ripped it open and was out!

Him being hurt was a bigger deal than he could ever fathom.

I knew it was a big deal because I had tears in my eyes on my way out.

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