We the Weirdos

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Someone was knocking on my bedroom door.

Seriously, my poor door has feelings. It's been knocked on too much.

"Mom- I said I didn't want to- oh." I mumbled awkwardly, not meeting Lysander's eyes from the doorway with an awkward (like, I'm not kidding on how high the awkward levels increased in those ten seconds) smile.

"Hi." He said. I'm not going to add 'awkwardly' at the end because everything that happened in that conversation was awkward.

Like, everything.

"Hi," I replied. "What brings you here?"

If was on a phone call, I'd slap myself. That was something stupid to say. He obviously was here to hunt for elephants. Totally a normal thing to do in my room.

"I wanted to tell you something." He's talking right now. Bruh. Unless my brain is playing tricks on me, but I know my brain loves me too much to do that right now.

"Yeah?" I asked. I was a little curious about what he had to say. But that didn't mean that awkwardness was gone just yet.

"Please don't make this weirder than it already is," I said the same time he said, "I have a crush on you, Julia."

"Yeeep. You totally made this weirder." I said.

Then I comprehended what he just said.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"IsaidIhaveacrushonyoujulia." He said all the words at the same time that it was kinda cute.

And he was skipping class, too, seeing that it was only two o'clock.

"I heard you right the first time," I coughed, "But thanks for repeating it and making it clearer."

"So.." He stretched the word for a really long time.

"I'm sorry, Lysander." I said, "I have to say, yes, me too."
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The stretch of silence was longer than the time when Lysander said, "Sooo" for a really long time.

"Yeah." I said, "You heard me right the first time, and if you didn't, I'm sorry. I can't repeat it again."

He looked at me weirdly. But it wasn't a bad weird. It's... a good kind of weird, I guess.

"Really?" He asked me.

"Yeah," I said, "Really. But I don't think we'll work out." I said the last sentence more quietly because it hurt me as much as it hurt me.

I knew that those words hurt him because of the flash of pain that went across his face.

He didn't yell. He didn't cry. He didn't scream. In fact, he was creepily silent.

Instead, he just asked, "Why?"

That was what hurt the most. That he sounded like he didn't really care, but I know he did.

"You just broke up with your girlfriend. Maybe we could.... when you're over your heartbreak.. and stuff like that," I said, pausing in between.

"No, Julia, I'm ready. I'm ready now."

I'm not so sure.

"I'm sorry." I said, turning away.

He sighed. "I wish I could go back to a stupid 13-year old and ruin my life a completely different way. I have new ideas." He grumbled.

"I get it. I completely get it. I don't want to pressure you. But don't think of yourself as a replacement for my girlfriend, because you're obviously way better." He said, meeting my eyes with a smile.