Unexpectedly turned into a cat, Kat falls into Middle-earth with the mission to prevent a death. In a feline form she can only communicate with the elf Legolas - and that he is such an attractive specimen is certainly not helpful...
A humorous (but...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"Nanny Ogg could see the future in the froth on a beer mug. It invariably showed that she was going to enjoy a refreshing drink which she almost certainly was not going to pay for."
― Terry Pratchett, Maskerade
31. Women's Rights Legolas suspiciously peered into the mug. Its contents looked much like diluted pee, and the smell was not much better – especially not as it mingled with the stench of a hall full of unwashed humans.
"A fine beverage!" Gimli emptied his mug and turned to one of the serving maids. "Another one please, my lass."
"I miss wine." Legolas took a sip and grimaced. He'd have preferred water to this, but apparently Théoden didn't serve that.
"Wine, when you can have ale? Ah, my lad, you have much to learn."
"If you like this, you should try our firewater." Yngling leaned over the table conspiratorially. At his feet the tomcat was busy devouring a plate full of chicken entrails.
"Firewater? I like the sound of that." Gimli chuckled.
"We make it with sugar beets. It's a sort of wine, but very strong. One small cup and you'll feel like you had two pints of beer." The young man's blue eyes sparkled.
"You are much too young to drink firewater." Gamling frowned. "I wish you wouldn't spend so much time with Värsting and Buse. They're a bad influence."
"Yeah, because you never drank firewater in your youth?" Yngling grinned.
"Well, I... Uh."
"There you go then."
Legolas hid his grin behind his mug.
Gimli nudged him with his elbow. "Look at that! What's Merry doing? And what's he saying? I know you can hear."
Legolas followed his gaze. At the head table, Merry had fallen on his knees and put his sword on King Théoden's lap, and the man just placed his hand on the hobbit's head. Legolas' sensitive ears were not exactly a blessing in an echoing stone hall full of Rohirrim warriors so he had done his best to zone out, but now he tried to pick out the hobbit's voice over the din.
"Merry just offered Théoden his service," he reported. "And the king says he shall be an esquire of Rohan, of the household of Meduseld."
"Ha! Fancy that. He's come up in the world, has our lad!"
After the meal, the king led everyone out to the courtyard to prepare for departure. He had sent messengers to gather all able men in Rohan, for any moment now the call could come from Gondor that their ally was needed against their common enemy, and when that happened Théoden would be ready.
When Merry came over to them, Gimli made a flourishing bow. "Welcome Meriadoc Brandybuck, esquire."
Merry smiled weakly. "I had no idea he'd do that. I just thought I should offer him my help... Not that I can do much." He stroked his short sword scabbard and sighed. "I feel kind of useless and small around all these big warriors. I wish Pippin was here." He glanced at Legolas. "And Kat."
