Are you afraid?

31

Raven's POV

The audacity! He thinks I enjoy making him uncomfortable?! After everything I've done to try to make him feel comfortable around me?!

"Do we really make him that uncomfortable?" Phobia asks from the mirror "I thought this would help, I just wanted us to be friends with him."

I've already said my peace to Loki, so I turn to look at phobia in the mirror.

"Yes, we make him uncomfortable. I know you didn't mean to," I say softly "this is why we try to make friends before we show people what we are." Phobia has always hated that we didn't just straight up show everyone who and what we are. This is at least a good example of why I believe that method works better.

"Maybe we needed to save them," phobia says looking thoughtful "that's why Grace was so accepting of us remember? She liked us because we saved her." I frown at that, it's a very sad statement but said with such hope and pride. She doesn't know how wrong and messed up it is to think that Grace only liked us because we saved her all those years ago.

"No, Phobia. Grace liked us before we saved her. Sure it made it easier to grasp that we weren't monsters because we saved her but she already knew of our kind nature before she saw the real us," I say shrugging "earning everyone here's trust is going to take a bit more then just saving them from danger."

I roll my wings before looking back at Loki. He's watching me and Phobia as if he's trying to figure out an odd riddle. I huff shocking him out of his thoughts before going to sit on the edge of my bed.

"I know it's weird," I say softly "but do you need to look at me that way when we talk?" He clears his throat before moving over to the small couch I have in the corner by the book shelf.

"I'm not backing out of our deal," Loki says sounding sure of himself "I've already given you my word that I'd follow through." I smile softly nodding.

"I forget you do not break your word where your from," I say looking him up and down "although I would not judge you for breaking your word."

"Why? Because I'm the god of lies?" He growls hunches raised ready to defend himself.

"No, because of what you've promised," I huff at his aggression rolling my eyes "I can clearly see how much you dislike me, and how unsafe you feel around me. Spending an hour a day for three mouths? That sounds like hell."

"Yet you still made the deal with me," Loki mumbles.

"No, Phobia made the deal with you," I correct wings shuffling in annoyance "and you agreed to the terms. Just because I understand why you'd want to back out doesn't mean I think your being taken advantage of." Loki looks away at that and we sit on silence for a long moment.

I look over at the abandoned book on the ground where Loki dropped it earlier with his tea. He got tea all over the ground luckily most of it missed the bed. I stand picking up the book flipping to the page about how to kill a Fearling.

"Isn't it ironic?" I chuckle humorlessly down at the page "someone has to stab me in the back to kill me. My mother backstabbed my dad and I backstabbed her. It sounds like madness when you think of it that way." Looking over at Loki I can tell he's uncomfortable with the topic.

"The book mentions screaming," he says looking at the book more then me.

"Ah, yes well," I say shrugging "It's hard to explain. I don't know what exactly happens when I scream, I'm sure it says all of the details in here somewhere but all I know is I create a- ah what would you call it?" I try to find the word looking down at Obi who's sat quietly this whole time but he's not much help.

"Don't look at me! All I know is to show up," Obi huffs holding his front legs up as if to physically block the attention. I roll my eyes at his behavior.

"I summon a bunch of creatures like Obi," I say shrugging "there's a word for it I believe. It'll come to me eventually."

"That doesn't sound as bad as the book made it out to be," Loki says smirking as he looks down at Obi.

"You should meet some of my brothers," Obi chuckles darkly "then maybe you'd think differently." Loki shifts uncomfortable once more.

"Here, I'm sure your still interested in reading more," I say holding out the book to Loki "plus might as well read what you'd like and ask me about anything that catches your attention. I don't mind demonstrating most things." He takes the book from me and flips to a random page.

"Your wings," he blurts out before he even looks at the book "do you use them to show emotion?" Not the type of question I was expecting, and honestly it catches me off guard.

"In a way yes," I think about it for a moment looking back at my wings "although I control them a bit. Most of the reactions I'm sure you see are subdued. Phobia doesn't do that as much and if you pay attention you'd see that when she's in control she moves her wings around quite a bit."

He nods absentmindedly "you said your feathers don't fall out on their own, does that mean you don't need to groom them?"

"Like a bird?" My wings fluff up at the thought.

"Well, they are bird like," he's now got his full attention on my wings. I roll my eyes at him only slightly offended at the comparison.

"I just shower and wash them like I'd wash my hair. There's no need to groom them like a bird," I say shaking out my wings "although it's nice to have someone run their hands through them. It's like having your hair played with almost. Not necessary but welcome." Loki seems to think on that for a moment. He seems almost calm now.

"Our hour is up," he says standing suddenly and walking out in a quick manner. I just watch him go sighing softly. Our first calm conversation. Hopefully it gets better from here.