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Friday could not come soon enough. Though he never liked to admit it, first shows and performing, in general, made Ezra extremely nervous. The thought of his fans turning against him or him fumbling over the lyrics or stage is enough to keep him relatively sober and on edge for the two days leading up to the concert.
Still, a clear mind for Ezra was an open door that invited all his demons right back in. Though he could finally get a coherent thought through his head, the male began to find every little flaw with his singing and the music with every passing soundcheck. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could picture was him falling off the stage at the Grammys. It was enough to keep him up nearly every night.
It's just nerves. That saying became a mantra leading up to the final soundcheck on Friday afternoon. For a brief moment, the male had convinced himself that he could not do this. He would fail himself, the band, and —
He wouldn't let himself get that far.
Yet, as he took the stage for the final time before their show, Ezra could feel the clarity he had been desperately searching for since the moment he entered that godforsaken suite. Finally, Grand Motel was playing like they used to.
Hell, even Ambrose and Jude could feel it. Their relationship had been slowly but surely rebuilding for the past few months, and perhaps that's part of the reason they look so put together on stage now. The two bandmates were trusting him again, and he wasn't letting them down.
It's this notion that keeps him steady through the final preparations for the evening. He's lounging in the makeup chair while a makeup artist applies some light concealer to his dark circles. Jude and Ambrose are lounging around on the couch beside him in anticipation for the show to begin.
"Five minutes until showtime, girlcrush. Five minutes until showtime," a voice alerts over an intercom, which causes Jude to spring from his seat.
"I promised Callie I'd watch their set," he explains, which prompts Ambrose to flash a shit eating grin towards the curly headed blonde.
"Oh, did you?" He teases, which causes Jude to let out a huff and roll his eyes, "Tell me, where exactly on our bus are you going to erect her shrine, since we're on the subject?"
"Dude, shut up," he warns, "It's not like that."
"Then what is it like?" Ezra interjects with a playful grin. It's the first time he's even indulged himself in some healthy teasing with the boys since before his breakup. They'd been far too tense to allow that sort of behavior then, but now it feels different.
"I'm just being friendly, that's all," he assures with rosy cheeks, "Not everyone makes nice just to get into a girl's pants."
Ezra lets out a laugh, checking the work of his makeup artist before giving her an approving nod. "I don't have to make nice to fuck," he reminds with a cocky grin.
