1.Deary diary...

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I sigh An Sat up on my bed I woke up to the front door slamming again
' probably dad or mom ' I got out of bed an Looked to my window watching A Black car Pull put of the drive way an speed away. ' At least i wont have to deal with them ' I Grabbed F/c Sweater An Put My turtle neck on first then My Sweater, I Put My Jeans on then Grabbed my Backpack an out of my room to The kitchen, I was met with My Older brother,He scoffed an pushed me out of the way an left the house slamming the Front door, ' Fuck this' i Grabbed a water bottle then left the house locking the door an Started walking to School, I might have been 30 minutes early but Who cares, I walked to my locker an Opened it Grabbing My stash of Cigarettes an ran outside behind the bleachers an started to smoke trying to Forget everything that Happened this morning an My whole life, After 10 minutes I smashed the end of the Cigarette an jogged to my locker, While i was sorting My Stuff I got pushed to the floor an kicked hard, I spat some saliva out from Getting the wind knocked out of me. I looked to see Peter, My main bully over the years,This 6.4 Tall Goth Fucker Loves picking on me an I just let it happen why? Cause... I dont know why I just do I guess Im used to it Got Beat up from school an home so Its Normal for Bruises to be all over me,

  I Sighed an went to get up but he pushed me down again "Your so fucking gross.." He walked away as I sat on the floor, I Laughed to myself ' Another day another beating ' I started walking to Science An I sat down Taking my sketch book out an doodling Little drawings,With out knowing i Was doodling Peter I blushed an Flipped the page' Why did i have to draw him!'

(I drew these they kinda Suck but eh🤷)I slammed my head on my sketch book an That's when i heard a laugh, I looked up an there was Peter " Maybe If you Beat yourself i wont have to do it anymore" I sighed an sat there awkwardly While Peter sat Be...

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(I drew these they kinda Suck but eh🤷)
I slammed my head on my sketch book an That's when i heard a laugh, I looked up an there was Peter " Maybe If you Beat yourself i wont have to do it anymore" I sighed an sat there awkwardly While Peter sat Behind Pulling my hair an Trying to piss me off,  When student started to walk in an Sit down me pulled my hair hard. Instead of Groaning in Pain I Moaned out, He let go of my hair an I Grabbed my hair an Turned to see him covering his mouth with his face red. I whisper yelled at him" Don't do that!" I turned back around an That's when the teacher walked in An She started class, The Whole time I Was flustered an Didn't want to look at peter but i knew i would have to See him when I leave class. When the bell rang I Sat up grabbed my bag an Ran out of the class room an straight to the bathrooms, I Locked Myself in a Stall an Sat down slapping my cheeks ' What the fuck was that! Why did i moan! It should have hurt!?' I Groaned an Left the stall an slashed water on my face. Then I walked out an to my locker to be meet with Peter 'Shit' He pushed me to the floor an Kicked me hard,I Coughed an Tried to get up be he Kicked me again
"You like that dont you Little Fuck!"
I Groaned an Sat up he Laughed ab walked away. I stood up an Threw my books in my locker an Went Through the rest of school normal With a Beating every now an then But after I just grabbed my bag an Ran out as fast as i could, I ran to the dinner hoping i wasn't late

I slammed the Dinners door open an saw Tk sitting Behind the counter Shaking there Head " I dont know why you always run here,You know i cover You till you get here" i laughd Exhausted An Walked to the back room "I know Tk but I still try an get here"
I changed Into my uniform an then started waiting Tables,  After Work finished at 6:45 I changed to my regular clothes an Started walking home when i felt like i was being watched I shook the feeling off an Walked Home when i got home The lights where on 'Shit' I Mentally prepared myself an walked inside I was met with a Beer bottle getting thrown at me, I ducked an Looked up to see my Dad He Walked over an Grabbed me by my hair an Slammed me against the wall,
"MAKE ME DINNER WHORE!"
He Slammed Me onto the floor an Kicked me harder, Harder the Peter It hurt so bad, I coughed Trying to get air back in my lungs But I couldn't Cause he kicked me again an smashed a Beer bottle next to me, The glass Cut My Leg. He walked away to The living room An left me there on the floor bleeding an Gasping for air, I slowly stood up trying to Reach the counter An i did but I was tumbling Over there. After i made dinner I Went to my room locking the room an I immediately Threw my bag into the corner an Punched my wall, Leaving a dent an My blood fist, i hurt, Hurt bad. I changed into Sweats an A tank top then sat down at my desk, I bandaged my Fist an Grabbed My diary It was hidden Under a floor board, I started writing

Dear Diary,
Normal day Except peter pulled my hair an i Moaned! I kinda liked it! An thats Not normal! I feel gross but I dont know. peter Is him self,Goth boy that bullies me
What am k supposed to do... My home life isnt any better But I feel This weird bubbly feeling when peter is around an when he beats me, Even just him sitting behind me Gets my heart Beat pumping...
HOLY SHIT!
I LIKE PETER!
No no that cant be it right? He beats me i shouldn't find that Attractive, Hes goth, he has long black hair,Wears Spiky belts,Chokers,an Bracelets. He Loves His stupid Fishnet crop top an arm sleeves but Its kinda cool looking
FUCK I REALLY DO LIKE HIM!
Fuck fuck fuck! Umm thats the end Of this entry
Y/n out!

  I slammed My diary shut an Put i under the floor boards an tossed myself on my bed i grabbed a pillow an shoved my face into it an Kicked my legs up an down,' i really did like him Omg! Its so fucked up but i do!' I drifted to sleep thinking about my Goth bully...

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