Tommy Shelby x Reader - 'Again' Pt1 REQUESTED

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So this was an incredible request but because I've made it so long, I've decided to do it in two parts. Second part will be up shortly!!

Thank you so much for your continued support guys. You've no idea how much it means!!

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'Yes sir' you uttered for the hundredth time since setting foot in your fathers office. Keeping your eyes on the floor and your tone quiet. Years upon years of beatings and lashings had taught you that making eye contact and challenging him was likely to one day leave you in a hospital bed. He was dangerous inside and outside of the home you grew up in and he never once failed to make sure you remembered that.

You couldn't think of a single time your father had been kind to you. Or smiled genuinely at you. In his eyes, you failed him the moment you were born a female. Being his first child, you'd disappointed him the second you entered this world, and you hadn't stopped disappointing him since. Your mother was just as cold as him, however your mind always reasoned that she'd probably lost her warmth when she married the monster before you. You pittied her over anything.

'I will not have you ruining this Y/N. It's good for business. You do exactly as you're told or so help me, I will kill you myself' he smacks his hand against the wood of his desk and you flinch, cowering back a few steps.

'Of course sir' you whisper before turning to leave.

'Oh, and Y/N..' your father calls as you open the door. You turn to face him, eyes focusing on the desk in front of him and not his face.
'Should we see any of those Blinder boys, you steer clear. Wouldn't want that Tommy lad to watch you die would you?' The malice in his voice makes your stomach twist and you feel the bile rising in your throat at the mention of his name. Even from your fathers mouth. You nod hurriedly before stepping out of the room, leaning heavily on the door the moment it closed behind you. Tears spring to your eyes but you bite back the sobs. You refuse to give your father the satisfaction.

It had been a couple of years since you'd heard Tommys name. And even then, the last time you heard it was when they all returned from the war. Changed and broken. But home nonetheless. He hadn't contacted you, not since the day your father had found you both together.

Tommy had been your best friend since school. You were both raised by opposing gangs, people who hated each other. And yet, when Tommy helped 11 year old you up, assessing the graze on your knee from your fall, and stared into your eyes, he only showed you tenderness. The first time anyone had looked at you so gently. The first time a hand had helped you instead of hit you. After that, you were both inseparable. Tommy would watch over you in school, waiting after classes for you or walking you half way home, ensuring your father never saw you together. You both had known the trouble you would be in and so your friendship stayed away from the adult world which you knew you would soon enter into. Ignorance really was bliss and so you both had pretended that when you were together, the gangs and violence didn't exist. It was an escape for you both.

Your father had grown suspicious when he noticed your dazed figure coming home after school everyday, late and smiling happily. He questioned you, he gave you the belt, he did everything to find out more about this new friend you had. But you lied and covered up Tommy's identity, refusing to let him take this one good thing from you. So your father did the next best thing - he made you change schools. An all girls school at that. You remembered running to school the next day and crying into Tommys shoulder. He only shrugged and smiled carelessly at you, admitting that he only came to school to see you anyway. So his plans changed and instead of going to school everyday, he would sneak off and meet you at your new school, finding hidden paths and walk ways to get home so you could still spend time together. That was till the day your father decided to meet you from school.

You had gotten to the gates, ready to slip away down the side of the gate and into the woods to meet Tommy in your normal spot. Except this time, you came face to face with your father, his eyes red and angry. Tommy appeared behind you, shock causing him to stop dead in his tracks too. You remember the terror, the way Tommy screamed and lunged when your father grabbed your hair and dragged you back to the car. The way your father had hit Tommy too. And told him if he ever saw you together again he wouldn't hesitate to end you both. That was the last time you had seen Tommy. 14 years old and tear stained cheeks, watching as you drove away with your father screaming and swearing at you. You didn't return to school after that. And you had no address to write to Tommy. So you resigned yourself to a life without him. Without your best friend.

Fast forward to today, the day of the races. You'd been told to look your best. Your mother didn't smile once as she helped with your hair that morning. Your father watched as you entered the hall, ready to leave when he said so.
'You'll do' he spat before leaving the house, knowing you would follow anyway.

The day itself was uneventful. Your father wished to make a deal with Billy Kimber and your job was to ensure you had an eye on him at all times while your fathers men shadowed Billy's men. You'd succeeded in capturing Billy's attention and within the hour, he had joined you, taking a seat closest to you and admiring you from the side as you kept your eyes trained on the table, your father sat across from you trying to barter with the man. A chair scraped across the floor as it was dragged out and it was at that moment that you raised your head to take a glance at the new comer. You wished you'd kept your head down. Sat across from you, making direct eye contact with you, was the blue eyed brummie that you had once spent your school days playing chase with. Your breath caught in your throat, your heart beating in your ears and your face heating up intensely. You felt the tension and your fathers rage flare.

'Steer clear' your fathers words echoed in your head. You had to leave.

Rising from your seat, you cleared your throat.

'Excuse me gentlemen' you managed to choke out.

'Do you need anything my dear' Billy's voice came from your side as he stood too. You only managed to shake your head before turning on your heel and walking to the only door you could see at the other side of the room. Once through the door, you felt air finally rushing to your lungs again, your throat was on fire and your vision grew blurry. He couldn't be here. It was too dangerous. You'd both be killed if you stayed here. The blue in his eyes stayed in your mind, branded there. You stood straight and wiped under your eyes. You needed to get out of here. You needed to steer clear, exactly as you'd been told.

You managed to calm your breathing and slowly walked to the end of the hall you had entered, trying all the doors along the way only to find out they were locked. As you reached the final door and heard the handle click, pushing it open slightly, you were stopped by a voice.

'Y/N' ... his voice. You shook your head, pushing open the door in front of you and stepping through it. In your head, this was a good idea. Until you realised you had stepped into a cleaning closet and now, as you turned, you came face to face with Tommy once more.

The silence that encased you felt like it wouldn't end. Both stood, centimetres between you as you just stared at one another. His hand reached up and fell upon your shoulder and involuntarily you flinch. A habit. His face tenses but his hand remains.

'Y/N' he says again, his voice quieter now, more steady and calm. You look down and shake your head as tears return to your eyes.

'I can't be here with you Tommy. I need to leave' you whisper, shaking his hand from your shoulder and trying to reach for the handle behind him. He shocks you when he pulls you into a hug, his arms encasing you and without thinking, you allow him to hold you as the tears fall freely now, your face pushed into his neck as he strokes your hair, something he used to do. Back when things were different.

'I can't believe you're here. With me. Again' he mumbles into your hair, his grip tightening as you finally breathe properly. Suddenly realising what you are doing, you pull back and push him away.

'I need to go. Tommy I need to leave, now. If he finds you and me here, he will kill us' you gasp out, breathing increasing again. Tommy reaches for you but you bat his hand away.

'Please, he's already angry. He won't hesitate if he finds us. I'm sorry, please, I have to go' you manage to get out as you finally pull open the door and leave Tommy stood watching your retreating figure, just like the last time he saw you.

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