Dysphoric (DNF-ftmGeorge)

Part 23

8k views guys tysm!!
I love going on wattpad to upload another chapter and seeing all the fun and supporting comments :))
Y'all really got into the story damn

Triggers:
-mentions of self harm
-self harm detail/injury detail

(Back to current day btw. So this is no longer a flashback thingy.)

Third person pov:

"Are you sure you'll be alright? Anything I can do for you?" Dreams mom asked.

"No thanks. I'll be fine. Thanks for calling."

"No problem, honey. Love you."

"Love you too, mom."

Beep beep

Dream sighed and placed his phone back on his bedside table, he rolled back over onto his side and wrapped himself up under the covers.
He felt like shit to be frank.
He didn't feel like he had enough physical or mental strength to get out of his bed.

It had been almost two days since the fight, two days without seeing George or even hearing his voice.
Nobody had tried to talk to him or even checked up on him. He assumed that none of them wanted to see him, they all probably hated him for yelling at Sapnap.
He regretted the way he acted, he definitely overreacted. It was only recently that he discovered that the unhealthy way he was pushing all his feelings down towards Patches was having a huge toll on his mental well-being, he had never wanted to snap at his best friend but he couldn't control it.

And that made him feel so pathetic.

His own thoughts just felt like shitty excuses for his terrible, unforgiving actions. He wasn't able to sleep, his thoughts kept him awake all night, only managing to get 3 hours during the last couple days. He hadn't eaten much either, he didn't want to get out of his bed let alone go to the kitchen.

He didn't want to mourn over Patches, he didn't want to make things seem real, but he also thought it was disrespectful not to. And he really wanted to talk to someone about it.

The first person that came to mind was George, the shorter male with brown hair and dark hazelnut eyes with a safe smile and comforting, soft and gentle embrace.
But he knew that wasn't a good idea right now, he wasn't quite sure how George felt towards him. Since Sapnap talked to him, that probably means he knows exactly what happened, and that I was a shitty friend.
But still, he kept his phone close just incase he decided to message.

He wanted to hear George's voice. He wanted to hold the boy tightly as he he told the taller that everything was going to be okay. He wanted the boys reassurance so badly.

-meanwhile in goggys fortress of solitude-

George groaned loudly into his pillow, holding it up against his face as he sat on his bed.
He took a deep breath and slammed the pillow on his lap as he glared daggers into his own reflection, his full body mirror opposite him on the other side of the room.

All he could see were the negatives.
All he could spot were his insecurities.
He felt so dysphoric for no reason. Just one of those days.

He studied his body up and down, picking out every single detail he could spot that he despised. Like routine, it was the same things as always.

Chest too big.

Can see shape.

Arms too feminine.

Too curved.

Eyelashes too long.

Eyes too feminine.