35| Tips

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*Written from Sam's POV*

Sarah

Me:
I need help

Sarah:
Wow
An Avenger needs my help
I'm so lucky

Me:
Sarah don't be like that

Sarah:
What I don't hear from
you in ages
And now you need my help
What could possibly
be that bad?

Me:
I'm going to be a father

Sarah:
Oh
Yeah that's bad

Me:
What?

Sarah:
I truly can't see you as a dad

Me:
That's hurtful

Sarah:
Good
Now you know how it feels

Me:
What?
I send you stuff

Sarah:
And I don't want to take it
I don't need your help Sam

Me:
But I need yours
Lori is due in seven months
and I don't think
I can handle it

Sarah:
That white chick?
Sam you'll be fine

Me:
Tell my head that
I can't stop worrying

Sarah:
What do you want from me?

Me:
Tell me how it was like
when you were pregnant?

Sarah:
I was cranky all the time
Needed weird food combinations
I even made Aaron
want to stab himself

Me:
That's reassuring

Sarah:
I'm just saying you shouldn't do
things to upset the baby mom
She will definitely skin you
alive if you do

Me:
You've never even met Lori
How do you know?

Sarah:
What is she like normally?

Me:
The kindest human being that
has many trust issues
It took a while for her to
let me in truly
She has taken in her sister so she
was away from their toxic parents
She makes pictures for a living
because she wants to show how
beautiful the world and
the people are

Sarah:
She seems wonderful
And she will kill you
in a heartbeat

Me:
You got that from what I said?

Sarah:
I know how hormones work
During pregnancy they're worse

Me:
Good to know
What else can I do?

Sarah:
She will have midnight cravings
Don't say no to those
Ever

Me:
Any more tips?

Sarah:
Keep her away from stress
The baby can die if there is any

Me:
I'll take over the office
Not that hard
And I have the
Spider kid with me

Sarah:
Also don't ever do something
to hurt her
If you step one toe out of line
she will know before you're
even home yet

Me:
I don't intent to

Sarah:
Good
When can I meet her?

Me:
You want to meet her?

Sarah:
Hey I can meet my future
sister-in-law

Me:
Sister-in-law?

Sarah:
You plan on staying
with her right?

Me:
Yeah

Sarah:
Marrying her someday

Me:
Yes

Sarah:
Then I'd like to meet her
before the baby is born

Me:
Come to Hoboken some day then

Sarah:
And the kids?

Me:
Take them with
She would love that

Sarah:
Not if she has a headache

Me:
Then we'll just let them roam
the balcony

Sarah:
I don't see that work out

Me:
It will be fine
Just find a date to come

Sarah:
Alright
Don't piss her off

Me:
I won't

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