I fell for the WRONG person.

Untitled Love

Here I'm.

Here I'm thinking about you again.

Thinking what wrong I did which made you and me to drift afar.

Here I'm mourning with another failure,

regretting for my unknown action(s)

make(s) me hate myself forever.

Here I'm urging myself to be strong,

shouting inside this apex room, 

relieving me from this exertion;

leaves my body sore.

Here I'm ignoring the throbbing of my heart,

hourly glancing at my feet;

numbing the human race around me and 

creating an imaginary sphere.

Here I'm shimmering by the paths

where I caught your first glance,

which I allured and used to admire.

Thought finally life is leading somewhere.

Here I'm under the dimmed street paths

where we jointly embraced,

deprived our very first kiss and

where we bid our goodbyes with longing desires.

Here I'm bringing back this reminiscence,

swallowing this lump by the throat.

If only sorry(s) could bring back what we were a year before.

Thus, Here I'm solemnly swearing 

never to be up front again,

making myself believe,

feelings are nothing but a wary,

 with which I need to be discreet.

 Here I'm upholding an evil steak fame,

 thinking everyday that If It repeats,

 I'll be the one to be shattered and

 it will only deepen these wounds to the core.

 Because that day for once I did,

 for what I'm now afraid of;

  and for twice if it's done,

   I'll be the one to regret undesirably then fore.

   Being all alone for so long,

   didn't bothered me before. 

    But here I'm realizing that now It will for sure.

    Here I'm waking up every morning,

    inside this cold room, present with emptiness;

    reminding me of your warmth;

    making my counting days uphold and future no more.

    Past actions and these memories

    shall bother for a lifetime.

     After all hereby,

     I'll be all alone

    and 

  all alone

  Here I am.                                                     

- Cheki 23:45