Chapter 23

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Almost two years passed and motherhood, as I thought, wasn't easy at all. 
Especially the first months. 
The noise, the continuous cry, the diapers and all the toys and babies stuff around my flat, the sleepless nights, the tiredness and a few mental breakdowns didn't make it easier. 
But the love I felt for Noah helped me a lot. 
Everyday he learned something new that brightened up my day, it could be him saying "mama", just a smile or simply a caress from him. 
Everyone helped me as the best they could, but especially Sebastian.
He helped me a lot, spending days and nights at my flat, helping me with the baby, looking after him and playing with him. 
He became a really important presence, both for me and Noah, and I couldn't be more thankful for it. 
But, of course, with a son and a man who almost never left my side it was pretty difficult to find someone who wanted to date me.
But for me the important thing was having my friends and family by my side. 
In the morning I woke up, as usual, hearing some crying. 
-Ugh...I'm coming sweetheart...mama is coming.- I growled, standing up and going to Noah, who now was 1 year and some months old.
-Mama! Mama!- he said, raising his arms to me when he saw me and stopping his crying.
-You want breakfast, don't you, little one?- I asked him, picking him up, yawning. 
-Gnam, gnam.- he said, as I giggled a little at his tentative talk. 
-Alright cutie pie, let's have breakfast.- I said to him, kissing his cheek -Wake up, the sun has risen.- I said, walking in the living room, where Sebastian was sleeping, on the couch, and shaking his shoulders a little. 
-What you want me to do? Photosynthesis? Am I a plant?- he mumbled, covering his face with a blanket -Let me sleep another five minutes...- he said in a low voice. 
-Se...Seb...Seb!- Noah stammered, leaning towards him. 
-Oh, hey. Good morning little guy.- he suddenly sat up, hearing his voice and taking him in his arms -Did you sleep well, buddy?- he asked him, as the baby squeezed his cheeks, making him grunt in pain -Okay, okay, young man. You won, you won.- he smiled at him -Did you slept well y/n?- he asked me, while giving Noah a little peluche to keep him calm while I made breakfast for the three of us. 
-Yeah, I slept 5 hours consecutive.- I said, it was a record for me. 
-y/n...- he said with a reproachful tone.
-I see this as an absolute win.- I smiled, trying to make him laugh, while making a baby bottle, a cup of tea and a cup of coffee. 
-I may not be doctor Banner, but I know you should get more sleep.- he gave me a look that screamed "I'm trying to not sound like your dad, but I'm worried for your health".
-It's okay, really. I'm okay.- I reassured him, smiling -I'll take a nap later, are you happy now?- I said, positioning our steamy cups full of tea and coffee on the table. 
I took Noah back and sat him in his booster seat.
-Yeah. I am.- he said, as I gave Noah the feeding bottle -Any plans for today?- he asked, blowing the hot drink before drinking it. 
-Not really.- I said, taking a sip of tea -You do?- 
-Actually yes. I was thinking about going to the cemetery, to change the flowers.- he said -If you want to come, you don't have to.-
-I think Noah will like to go out for a little.- I said, looking at him. 
-Yeah, he will enjoy it.- he said putting down his cup -Alright then, I'm going to change. I'll be back in...are twenty minutes enough?- he asked me. 
-Yeah, they should be enough.- I nodded, picking up Noah, who had just finished his milk. 
-Good. I'm going, bye.- he said, putting on his hoodie.
-Bye Seb.- I, simply, said.
-Seb...Se...Seb.- Noah hummed.
-That's right. Seb is my name, little guy.- he smiled at the baby, squeezed softly his cheek, then he left. 
-Alright cutie pie let's get ready, we're going out.- I told him, as he just smiled at me.
We got ready, Noah was wearing a black pair of pants and a red shirt, while I was wearing a pair of high-waisted jeans, a white tank top and a black jacket.
I quickly prepared the backpack for Noah and I heard knocking at the door. 
-Are you guys ready?- Sebastian asked, walking in.
-Yeah. We just finished getting ready.- I said, picking Noah up. 
We greeted Mrs Hudson, then we left Baker Street. 
-We should stop and buy some flowers.- he said, pointing to the flower shop. 
-Yeah. Let's go then.- I smiled. 
We went in and Noah wanted to go with Sebastian, so I gave him and I went to look at some flowers. 
While I was looking, I heard a male voice speaking. 
It was a knowing voice, but I couldn't understand who it could be.
I turned around and I saw a male figure with brown curly hair and baby blue eyes.
He was looking at me too. 
-y/n?- he asked me -Is it really you?- 
-Thomas?- I asked, surprised of seeing one of my ex -What are you doing here?- 
-I just came for a few weeks to visit my family. It's so good to see you. How are you?- he asked, smiling. 
-Yeah, I'm good. How are you?- I asked him. 
-I'm fine, thanks for asking.- he smiled, looking at me -How are your brothers? Sherlock was the one who didn't like, wasn't it?- 
-Yeah. He...he died two years ago.- I answered him.
-Oh god. I'm truly sorry, I didn't know. Forgive me.- he said, blushing for his fool. 
-It's okay, don't worry.- I smiled.
-y/n, Noah chose this flowe...oh, hi.- Sebastian said, approaching me.
-It's so cute. Good choice sweetie.- I smiled at the baby -Sebastian, Noah this is Thomas. Thomas these are Sebastian and Noah.- 
-My pleasure.- Seb said, looking at him.
-Nice to meet you.- Thomas smiled. 
-I'm going to pay real quick. Little guy wants to go with his mum?- he asked Noah, who in answer almost jumped in my arms, then he went to pay.
-You have a boyfriend and a baby, wow.- he said. 
-What? No. Sebastian is not my boyfriend, but Noah is my son.- I told him.
-So if I can ask, where is his father?- 
-He...he died...two years ago.- I answered, lowering my voice. 
-Oh my. I'm sorry.- he said, you could see he was truly ashamed. 
-Don't worry. It's okay.- I gave him a reassuring look. 
-Now I really have to go. It was so nice to meet you. But if you want to speak sometime you have my number.- he smiled, then he greeted me and walked out.
A moment later Sebastian approached me.
-Who was that?- he asked as we walked out. 
-Thomas. My ex.- I simply said.
-What he told you?-
-Just that if I wanted to talk I already had his number.- I shrugged. 
-You won't text him, right?- he asked.
-I don't know.- I smiled as we walked to the cemetery.

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