Comprehension

Shame

You stare at me blankly
as my heart stumbles over
the things you do_
I am embarrassed that this
is the type of person i love.

I am embarrassed that it
is so easy for you to hurt me.
Things have become so dark lately,
and I can't even tell you,
because my hurt always gets
across miscommunicated.

I am embarrassed that i
cannot tell you that you've hurt me,
because i know you will somehow turn
it into a betrayal from me to you.
I'm embarrassed okay,
i thought i knew who you were,
i thought i knew who i let into my heart.

You fool me some days,
when you wake up with false
pretenses of caring for my health.
But i have seen who you become
when you are hurt,
and i know the hearts that you
have sacrificed to fill up your emptiness.

I am embarrassed to have
ever believed you could become
more then a reflection of the people
i have survived.

I am embarrassed that this is the type of person I love.

       
                      -liyah smith