Of Lace and Lust | Taehyung x Reader

Part 9

"I'm home..." You mutter the habitual words to a dark living room as you hook your keys up on the rack, beside a stake that remains bare still. You stopped checking for his keychain a few days ago, the two-week mark of Taehyung's leaving. Kicking off your shoes, your phone vibrates as you shuffle to your room. Lina. Right. She's been checking in on you, making sure you're not falling into a spiral.

"Hey, Leens."

"Hey girl, how are you?"

"Surviving." You just handed in your first paper of the term two days ago, Friday, and are already working on the next. The summer semester is ruthless in its pace, and you're doing all you can to keep on top of things. You're heading into your final year of undergrad, and with all the grad school applications coming up soon... you need your GPA to be at its highest. You don't have time to worry about extraneous things. But you could never consider Tae extraneous.

"And... Taehyung?"

"Still not here." You pull open the fridge, begin to put away the groceries that you've bought: the one tray of eggs, the smaller carton of milk. "It's fine. Really. He's not playing his music all the time, so I can actually concentrate." Your laugh is shaky. "I bet Jin is sick of him by now."

"Why don't you go see him?"

"Please. If he wanted to see me, he'd come home."

"You never know. He might be feeling the same way as you!"

You plop onto the sofa. You've barely used it in the past few weeks, and it feels so empty without Taehyung's weight next to you, binging movies or blasting aliens. "I don't even know how I'm feeling. I'm awful at this stuff." Lina knows that too well, having witnessed many awkward dissolutions of casual relationships because you just didn't like your partner enough to make things serious. Hoseok had been the closest, but then graduation tore you apart before you could decide one way or the other.

"I think I have a pretty good idea," Lina says with a snort.

"Well, care to enlighten me too?"

"It's really something you have to realize on your own."

You roll your eyes. Things can never be easy for you, can they?

"Well. What I do know is that I miss him more than anything."

Lina is right. You want to see him. You want any sort of sign, an answer, or anything at all. Hell, if he's going to never talk to you again, you at least want to say goodbye.

Jumping to your feet, you grab your purse and keys. "I'm going to Jin's."

Lina laughs, enjoying the conviction in your voice. "Go get 'em."

That's how you find yourself in front of Jin's door thirty minutes later, still running on adrenaline and emotion. It's a nice apartment in the 'village' close to the university central, a perfect place for a grad student. Its price deterred most undergrads from living here, so it was relatively quiet and secure. You and Taehyung had considered renting here too, but could only afford a one-bedroom and he'd said it would be better to get separate rooms. Maybe if you were living here, all of this never would have happened.

Now isn't the time for hesitation. You raise a hand and knock three times, the throb of your heart intensifying each time hand meets wood. There's some shuffling from inside, then the unlocking of a door. When it opens, Jin is standing in casual lounge pants and a loose top, his hair somehow casually impeccable despite the drowsiness in his eyes. He's taken this Sunday to just relax, it seems.

"Hey, Jin."

He presses his full lips together. "Hi." There's something a lot like pity in his eyes and you hate that.

"Uhh, can I... Is he..."

"No, he's not here." He shakes his head.

"Oh." That was definitely a possibility, though one you'd thought would work out in your favor like all those cheesy romances you sometimes liked to binge. "Okay. Sorry. I'll get going now."

"Sorry." With that, the door shuts. Your footsteps fade as Jin turns towards his unexpected new roommate, standing in the shadows of the dimly-lit apartment. "Taehyung. You can't keep avoiding her forever. I'm not ready to be a landlord, but I will charge you rent."

Taehyung's face is sober. He stares at his hands, the ones that still recall the heat of your skin, soft and precious beneath him. "I know."