I was sitting outside in the backyard, crying because of..everything honestly. I'm so tired of having to keep everything I feel to myself. I haven't been going to therapy and I have no one to talk to about these things.
My mom, i don't want her to worry about me.
My sister, she's too young to understand and I don't want to drain her with my problems. I don't want her to live like I do.
Alexis, I just met her.
Camila, obvious reasons.
Courtney, me and her aren't close. She used to bully me and my ex girlfriend who was my girlfriend at the time, slept with her.
Ellie, my pretty gentlewoman. I want to talk to her, I want to tell her everything but like she said to Camila, I wouldn't because I'm going to make her feel bad since she's a part of my problems.
I feel bad for yelling at her but it felt so good letting it all out. Maybe on Camila yes but Ellie, I didn't want to hurt her like I just did.
I sniffed and stood up, going back inside of the house and closing the glass door. Amani already left because it was late, I'm assuming Camila and Courtney went back to their room and Ellie..she's right there, sleeping on the couch.
I went towards her and laid down on her couch with my head on her chest and arms wrapped around her waist. She groaned and shifted in her place "are you okay?" She asked with a tired voice, I nodded "but I don't wanna talk about it yet"
She kissed the top of my head and wrapped her arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer to her "whenever you wanna talk, I'm here" she said quietly. I nodded and let a tear fall down my cheek onto her shirt.
I'm crying because the fact that she's still so sweet to me, that she didn't get mad at me when I said all of that, makes me feel so special. Makes me feel like someone actually cares and loves me.
I looked up at her to see her eyes closed as her breathing started slowing down "I'm sorry" I said quietly, kissing her cheek "it's okay. I deserve it and what you said is true.." she opened her eyes and looked at me, her eyes a little red since she was tired.
"..if what you said made you feel relieved and happy then it's okay. I just don't want you to feel overwhelmed or anything, tell me these things..I wanna know every single detail about you even if it included me being the bad person"
"If you want me to..keep my distance from you in case you don't feel safe with me yet, it's gonna be hard but it's okay. I just want you to be happy and not overwhelmed"
I smiled and let another tear escape my eye. She wiped it and I placed my lips onto hers "I'm sorry for saying it like that. I should've talked to you without yelling at you or anything"
Ellie rubbed my cheek softly and placed a small kiss on my nose "it's okay. If I were you, I don't think I'll even make it till today. You went through so much and I could never be prouder than I am right now, you're so strong"
"You shouldn't be saying this while I'm crying, I won't stop now" I said trying to not cry. She laughed and kissed my forehead "just close your eyes and get some rest, we'll talk whenever you want to talk"
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Toxic love // lesbian story (intersex/g!p x girl)General Fiction
"Why are you mad at me?" I asked nervously, looking down. I didn't know it would make her mad that I had someone over to comfort me, i didn't want to call her so I won't annoy her. "Because Grace.." she said sighing "..I want you all for myself" ...