Caught in Fantasy (T)

55 6 0
                                    

Caught in Fantasy written by anonymously9917

Caught in Fantasy written by anonymously9917

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

i. COVER & TITLE

I like the idea of your cover, and I think it's perfectly fine. However, I'm not sure if it's quite the fantastic it could be. I would send your current pictures to a designer and see what they can do for you. As always, I have a reading list full of them that would be happy to help. I just think you could do with a little more manipulation of the fonts and textures to make the design truly alluring.

I quite like your title. It tells us what this story is going to be like right off the bat, but it also maintains an aspect of mystery and intrigue. I wouldn't change a thing about it!


ii. BLURB

I've made a massive effort to eradicate the use of story scenes in blurbs, so I'm embarrassed to say that I think yours really works. It's fun, intriguing, but it also gives us insight into what the story would be like and even the plot as well. Honestly, I don't think I'd change it other than cleaning up the grammar just a tad. 

As for the actual story blurb, it's right to the point and simple to understand. I think since it's so short, you could add just a bit more on the actual plot, but I'm not sure it would be entirely necessary. You have a good idea with your blurb, but I'm not sure I like the 'read Caught in Fantasy to find out' part. It's always better to end your blurb with a one-liner that doesn't resemble a question--to leave things final and yet also mysterious.

1 2 / 1 5


i

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

i. PUNCTUATION

the love of my life, #1: THE DASH

So we all know Tari loves dashes. Use them right. Dashes are just a simple way to gain respect from your readers. It's worth it to change them!

The hyphen (-) is what you currently use in place of what should be the EM dash. The hyphen is for hyphenated words only, such as long-term or father-in-law. The hyphen is just one press of the dash button.

Dreamland Review ArchiveWhere stories live. Discover now