Caught in Fantasy written by anonymously9917
i. COVER & TITLE
I like the idea of your cover, and I think it's perfectly fine. However, I'm not sure if it's quite the fantastic it could be. I would send your current pictures to a designer and see what they can do for you. As always, I have a reading list full of them that would be happy to help. I just think you could do with a little more manipulation of the fonts and textures to make the design truly alluring.
I quite like your title. It tells us what this story is going to be like right off the bat, but it also maintains an aspect of mystery and intrigue. I wouldn't change a thing about it!
ii. BLURB
I've made a massive effort to eradicate the use of story scenes in blurbs, so I'm embarrassed to say that I think yours really works. It's fun, intriguing, but it also gives us insight into what the story would be like and even the plot as well. Honestly, I don't think I'd change it other than cleaning up the grammar just a tad.
As for the actual story blurb, it's right to the point and simple to understand. I think since it's so short, you could add just a bit more on the actual plot, but I'm not sure it would be entirely necessary. You have a good idea with your blurb, but I'm not sure I like the 'read Caught in Fantasy to find out' part. It's always better to end your blurb with a one-liner that doesn't resemble a question--to leave things final and yet also mysterious.
1 2 / 1 5
i. PUNCTUATION
the love of my life, #1: THE DASH
So we all know Tari loves dashes. Use them right. Dashes are just a simple way to gain respect from your readers. It's worth it to change them!
The hyphen (-) is what you currently use in place of what should be the EM dash. The hyphen is for hyphenated words only, such as long-term or father-in-law. The hyphen is just one press of the dash button.
YOU ARE READING
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