~Decisions~

~chapter 128~

I scrunch my eyebrows in confusion. I touch my face. For sure. It's all wet. I wipe my tears. "I promise I'm fine" I say. He looks at Me.

"Watashi wa genki (I'm fine)"
"Anatade wanai (you're not)"

"If you says so" I respond in English. He roles his eyes. "I promise we will find him" Lisa says. I role my eyes. "I don't need you to promise me anything. I certainly don't need you to help me find my cousin" I say to her. "We need more girls on the team" jungkook says. I look at him as a tear escapes my eye.

His eyes soften for a second but go back to being cold. "We don't need them. YOU need them. I don't need them. WE don't need them" I say. "I want my fucking ring back" I say to j-hope. He looks at me. "You get it when you earn it" he says.

I silently sob. The phone rings again. I answer it. I put it on speaker.

"What the hell do you want from me!!"
"Lydia. Help us please"
"Oh god. Jackson. What did he do to you?"
"He beat me half to death. Raped Alice once. Lydia it was like I seen you all over again"
"What do you see around you?"
"It's a building. It's cold. And dirty. That's literally all I see"
"Hang in there for me. We'll find you"
"Lydia one more thing.."
"Yeah?"
"I love you"
"I-I love you t-to"

The call cuts. My anger hits me. I grab the flower vase and throw it at the wall. "Oh god lydia your hand" I hear jay b say. I look at it. I see a piece of glass stuck. I pull it out with no hesitation. "Track the call" I say. "I'm trying boss" hoshi says. "Boss? You have them calling you boss now" Lisa says with a chuckle. I turn and look at her. My dark eyes scaring her as she steps back.

"Did I say you can open your mouth?" I ask her Walking towards her, stepping on the glass with my shoes. She gulps. I grab her by the throat. "Did I say you can answer back?" I say as I add pressure. "N-no" she says. I smirk at her. Her face turns red. I let her goes as she gasps for air.

"Are you insane!" Rose yells. "Do you want me to fucking kill you!" I yell at her. "Just shut the fuck up rose! Everything was fine! My fucking marriage was fine before jungkook accused me of cheating, which never happened!" I yell.

"I was trying to be fucking okay! But no! I'm away from my fucking son! I'm angry! I'm scared! I don't know exactly what to fucking do okay! Just get the fuck out of here before I hurt you!" I yell at her. She looks at me. "Lydia, stop yelling you're giving me a headache" Jennie says. I look at her and slap her. Everyone gasps. "Don't open your mouth" I say.

"Now stand the fuck up" I say looking at Lisa. She stands up. "Are you gonna open your mouth to?" I say look at jisoo. She shakes her head. "Jennie. Stand. Up." I say. I look at jisoo signaling her to stand up. I look at all the girls. "Go home" I say. They gulp. "Go. Go home. Before I kill you with my bare hands" I say. They gulp and walk out.

I sigh. "let's clean this" Jin says. He signals the boys. My husbands. To go as he yanks me with him. We walk into the private room. They lock the door. I sit on the bed as he grabs the first aid kit. He pulls my hand towards him. I look at him as he pours alcohol on my hand. He starts to wipe my hand. He puts goz on it. He wraps it up. I pull my hand away from him.

"Where did you go last night?" Suga asks. I look at him. I look out the window. "I needed a break" I say. "That's not a good answer" he says. "Well I don't know what to say then" I say to him. I look back at him. He sighs and walks towards me. He slaps me. I sigh. "You deserve that" he says. "For what?" I say.

"Lydia" Jimin warns. "No! What did I deserve that for!?" I say standing up. "For being a honest fucking wife! For not lying to you! For not spreading my legs to you! What was that for!?" I yell at him as my eyes water all over again. He looks at me. "TELL ME MIN YOONGI!?" I yell. He looks at me. "You're a good wife. You have a bad attitude and someone needs to fix that" he says.

"Bad attitude" I say as I nod my head. I look out the window. "A bad attitude" I say again. "A bad attitude" I say as I look back at him. "Are you fucking dumb" I say. He looks at me and walks towards me. I look at him. "Yes, a bad fucking attitude. You can't disrespect someone who's trying to help" he says.

"Trying to help!? They weren't trying to help! They were trying to get as close as they possibly fucking could!" I yell at him. I turn and look at jungkook. "And I never fucking cheated on you" I say. He looks at me. "I know" he says smirking. "I just had to do something" he says. "To entertain myself" he says again. I let my tears fall freely. I walk towards him and slap him. "Don't worry. That was for entertainment" I say. I walk away from him but he yanks me back.

"You don't get to slap me and think you can get away with that" he says. "Jungkook let me go" I say trying to wiggle out. He drags me to the bed. He throws me on top of it as he climbs over me. Pinning my arms on the sides of my head. My dress rising up as he is in the middle of my legs. "Get off of me" I say trying to wiggle my arms. He looks at me. "Stop fucking moving!" He yells. "You don't get to be disrespectful to your husbands and think you can get away with it!" He yells. I look at him. My tears fall as he stares at me. "Get off of me you asshole!" I yell at him. He pins me to the bed.

I remember my moment with Jimin and stop fighting.

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*flashback*

"Stop fucking moving!" He yells. "I'm so frustrated with you lydia!!" He yells. He hovers over me. "You know how frustrating you are!" He yells. "I can't ever please you!" He yells. "Jimin let me go! You're just mad!" I yell at him. I try to wiggle out. "Stop! I'm so sick of you lydia! You're exhausting! Can't you learn to listen!! Be a good fucking girlfriend for once and listen!" He yells at me. "I'm trying Jimin! But it's hard when you are always gone! I Can't just stay here and let you love me, when we don't even have time together!" I yell crying. He looks at me and lets me go.

I curl into a ball and sob. I sob until I fall to sleep

*end of flashback*
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I look at jungkook. "Have you had enough" he says in the most calmest voice. As if nothing happened. Another tear escapes. "Of this relationship? Yeah I've had enough" I whisper. "You never learn your lessons do you. Always have to be a fucking smart ass" he says. He grips my wrists tighter. I wince. "Let go" I say. He looks at me. "Dammit jungkook let me go!" I say sobbing.

"No! You still don't listen!" He yells. I sob. "If you loved me you wouldn't be doing this" I choke out. He looks at me. "I love you. That's why I'm doing it" he says. "No! If you really love me! You wouldn't be doing this!" I yell. "I'm not Lisa, or Jennie, or any other fucking girl. I'm lydia. I don't listen. I'm my own person!" I yell. He looks at me. "You're our wife" he says. "Without the ring. I'm not your wife" I say. He lets me go. He climbs off of me. I sit up and put my head in my hands as I silently sob.

"Here" I hear j-hope say. I look up and he's holding my ring. "I don't want it" I whisper. "I don't want this. If this is how it's always gonna be." I choke out. "I can't handle this again" I say looking at him. "Can't you see I can't handle it" I say sobbing. "I hate being put in pain by you guys" I say. "I can't handle being more broken then I already am" I whisper.

"Please don't put me in anymore pain" I say. I look at all of them. J-hope grabs my hand and slips on my ring. I look down at my hand. "You've learned your lesson" he says. I sob. He hugs me. I continue sobbing in his chest. "Shh baby it's over. It's okay now. We are okay now." He says. I push him off of me. I walk towards the door and unlock it.

I stop mid way of twisting the door handle. If I go...I get punished again. But if I stay...they'll think We are okay and we aren't. I open it and run out. I run up to the roof top. I take in a shaky deep breath, that is mixed with a sob.

I close my eyes and feel the cold breeze against my skin.

Hope you like this chapter!!