𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒. FINNICK ODAIR

𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫

warning: this chapter contains few mentions of suicide and depression. don't read if you are easily triggered.

Here I leave some Suicide Crisis Lines numbers in case you want to talk to someone.

List of suicide crisis lines
(USA): 1-800-273-8255
(UK): 0800 689 5652
(Canada): 1-833-456-4566
(Mexico): (55) 5259-8121
(Australia): 13 11 14

THE BEDROOM. Far away from cameras, and with the privilege of a lock, was the place Finnick and Belle could talk in peace.

It was three am, last day of training, the day of the private sessions.

And they couldn't sleep during this night either.

"Belle," he whispered as the girl was slowly falling asleep in his arms. "I have to tell you something."

Sometimes, when they were little and had secret sleepovers in which Finnick would snuck in through Belle's window, they slept this way. Hugged, one in the other's arms. It was the only thing that made them sleep through the days after they turned eleven.

"Not right now, Finn," she mumbled as she stroked his chest with her finger. "I'm tired."

"When we were kids," he started, untangling her hair with his fingers while staring at the ceiling, "I killed your cat."

Belle opened her eyes widely and sat down straight on the bed while Finnick bursted out laughing. She was not laughing.

"You killed Sargent Teacups?"

"By accident."

"You told me he ran away! My dad confirmed it."

"He accidentally fell from the boat and drowned." She frowned. "I accidentally pushed him from the boat and he drowned." She scoffed, not even wanting to believe it. "Okay, I threw him in the water to see if he could swim and he couldn't, so he drowned."

"Finnick!"

He sat down on the bed again, staring at her. "Your father and I promised to keep the secret to the grave. He died, and now I'll probably die so this is about it. I had to tell you!" He couldn't stop laughing. She hit him with the pillow and he cracked up laughing once more. "I'm sorry!"

"I loved that cat!"

"I was six! Maybe seven!" He brushed her hair off her face as he eased his laughing. "I'm sorry. I know you loved that ugly smelly cat with your life, but I had to do it."

"You are the worst," she whispered as he had her face in his hands, a smile growing on his face. "But... I have something to admit as well."

"What?" He mumbled as she slowly laid down on the bed again, her head on the pillow and the palm of his hand still on her cheek.

"Remember when I told you I kissed Nean at the edge of the beach when I was eleven?"

Yeah, and he remembered wanting to die at that moment. "I might recall something of it, yes."

"That never happened," she whispered with a teasing smile, making Finnick confused. "I just wanted to see if you would get jealous." She shrugged. "And you didn't."

"Oh, I did get jealous," he admitted with complete honesty, surprising her. "I got so jealous I hit Nean with a stick two days after you told me."

"That's why he had a black eye?"

"I felt so bad about it I told your dad. He said don't to worry about it."

Belle's dad. Everyone's favorite person in District 4, and the one that no one expected to kill himself.

He treated Finnick like someone of the family, so when his name was pulled from the pool and he was sent to the games, he entered in a state of depression that he could never recover from. Finnick won, but he was still down.

But Belle's name been read out loud was the last straw his body could handle. He died the fourth night of the games in his bed, watching as Belle was about to die do to the cold and hunger. Her mother told her he died peacefully in his sleep, but it wasn't true.

He killed himself.

It affected Belle. She thought about doing the same. God, she even tried it once but she stopped herself from going too far. One day her dad was there, she went to Hell and when she was back, Hell had followed her home.

He was dead. Her dad was dead.

And she still hadn't forgiven him for it.

"Sounds like my dad," she said softly and he smiled, nodding. "He liked to keep secrets."

"He taught me to keep some of my own."

She smiled. "We should sleep," she said and he nodded, letting her lay her back on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Belle," he called her softly.

"Yeah?" She whispered back.

She knew he was smiling. "Sargent Teacups?"

"Shut up."

And both of them fell asleep quickly after.

The gasp of horror Auburn made when she found Finnick inside Belle's bed the next morning, hugging her, without the possibility of being any closer, rated between hilarious and utterly embarrassing.

It made them wake up by how loud it was. They were both confused when they saw her, standing there, trying to compose herself as she was staring to both of them.

"Huh... uhm... hmm..." she was clearing her throat as Finnick and Belle were staring at her, practically about to burst out laughing at any second. "Belle... after your private session, we have to get you ready for the dinner with the tributes. I've already picked up a dress for you. And then, you'll come back her, rest peacefully and we'll get you dress for the interview with Ceaser tomorrow. I'll give you some time to.. shower and... for Finnick to go to his room before Yoleere sees he is not there and has a panic attack."

Auburn began walking away, closing the door behind her, as Finnick yelled.

"Don't worry, Auburn! I'm not legally naked right now! Just the normal amount."

Belle bursted out laughing before hitting him with a pillow, trying to ease herself before standing up from the bed. Finnick remained there, exhaling tiredly, before closing his eyes again.

"Finnick, go to your room."

"I can shower here," Finnick said before standing up before walking towards the bathroom, right behind her. "We are all going to die eventually anyway."

They both got inside the bathroom, besides Belle's reproaches. Finnick turned on the shower and looked down to Belle's shirt with a teasing smirk.

"We used to have all the time in the world, you and I." He played with the first button of her shirt. "Now that eternity has been reduced to this moment."

"Oh, Finnick," she whispered before pushing him out of the bathroom, making him scoff. "You waited eight years. You can wait one more day."

She laid on the door frame, teasingly, looking incredibly hot, making Finnick's whole skin burn. That white loose shirt that was the only thing keeping him from seeing her naked skin was tempting him. But any hope of getting anything that moment faded away when she closed the door in his face.