Breaking the Bond that Binds.

Chapter 30 - That &%$#@ Bond

I was hoping I'd have time for a longer chapter but ran out of time.  I also was hoping for some hot steamy sex  but they just seemed to want to talk instead...maybe the next chapter.  Which will be next week.  Ta for now.

.......

Damien filled our glasses and raised his. "Here's to being free." I was happy to toast to that  "Here's to being free." I raised my glass as well.

I've given my future a lot of thought since I got here and strangely all the changes I'm planning are thanks to Damien. "I'm going to use the money you gave me." I blurted out.  "You seem keen for me to use it so I think I will when I get back'.

"It wasn't an easy decision to come to, my pride felt a little betrayed but logically it makes sense." I gulped down my second champagne. It tasted like nothing but gave me a nice buzz.

 "I'll finish high school and take some culinary or patisserie courses.  Thank you Damien for your generosity."   Damien cocked an eyebrow, I wasn't sure what that meant.  "My thank you has been a long time coming."

"I'll rent this place out or sell it. I won't ever be back." I said casually. Damien leaned across the table with a death grip on the delicate glass. "There's nothing for you here at all?" I'm not sure why he is so angry but the champagne took the edge off of my concern for his feelings...pfft...who cares what he thinks.

Feeling cocky I poured the last dregs of the bottle into my glass and gulped it down. "What about you. You finally get a mate worthy to be your Luna. They must be lining up around the block for that job." I couldn't keep the sarcasm out of my voice. "Some buxom female with child bearing hips to fuck senseless when ever you please and give you enough strapping, square jawed heirs to form your own Pure Blood soccer team." We did just toast to being free didn't we...oh how good it is to not have to run and hide because of the pain. I blame that new found freedom for not listening to my smarter self when it whispered, it's time to shut up. The urge to provoke him felt like so much more fun....the night was getting even better.

His eyes started to ice over, he was getting angrier by the minute. Now that I wasn't inhibited by the bond I could rip into him as much as I wanted....what's the worst that could happen....he'd beat me up.....big whoop.

I went and got beers out of the fridge. I was feeling good and wanted the mood to last.

I put one in front of Damien and opened mine. I was on a roll, the run had given me a huge Adrenalin rush and the alcohol was keeping up there.

"I have a question for you." I flopped on the couch and in my state of oblivious happiness and asked Damien. "When you said you had kept your first kiss for your truemate...is that another way of saying you're still a virgin?" It was like doing a cha cha on train lines when a speeding train is coming at you....oblivious.

Next minute I'm hauled up and my face is inches away from Damien. He's got a grip on the top of my arms and I'm not going anywhere. Then his face turns a darker shade of red. He seems to get side tracked and leans in to sniff my neck, my hair. "Why do you smell like Paul." He sniffs my chest. "Why is he all over you?"  He started to growl, very low, deep and scary.

"I told you we went for a run, our wolves played together and we curled up together to rest. He must have rubbed off on me. No biggy." I tried to shake him off but he held on tight. Why was he acting like this? Has the rejection failed a second time? I look into his eyes, search his face for a sign. I felt fine but Damien not so much. "Has that fucking rejection ceremony failed again."

"The bond is definitely broken. I can't feel you anymore." Well that's a relief but he still didn't look any happier. "I can see the change in you. There's no shying away from drama now,  you're a lot more mouthy as well." Damien let go of me.  He shook his head and I imagined his wolf doing the same, shaking off his anger. 

"And you're right I haven't had sex with anyone. And whose fault is that.  Yours.   It was impossible when you were always in my head."   I suppose he's right I've been like a ghost, a very sexy one,  haunting him.   Well his future Luna will have fun training him. That amazing body , that powerful alpha aura shows a lot of potential. Lucky bitch.

"Thankfully, the visions came and went quickly but I always felt the same way afterwards. Miserable, frustrated, mostly angry."  He rubbed his temples.  Even remembering is difficult  for him.

 "Sometimes you wondered if I still sensed you. Do you remember thinking that?"  He turned to me.  His eyes were softer, sad for a moment.    "If it hurt me when you were enjoying sex with someone else.  You hoped it hurt."  Shit he knew that...that was truly cringeworthy. I didn't really think he sensed anything, it was just a spiteful thought. 

Damien sat down at the table and opened his beer and took a long drink. "It did, it was torture seeing James or some other guy fucking you, when you still felt like you were my mate."   He was really making me lose my happy buzz. Now I just feel guilty and mean spirited.  

"How could I find a new mate. I had to put all my energy into controlling my feelings 24/7. Then father got ill and I became Alpha. It got worse the closer you got to your birthday. You kept popping into my head. That's why I decided it had to end. I couldn't take it any more."

I really felt bad for Damien. I had had it easy, until the bond kicked in when I turned 18. I stood behind him, my hands on his strong shoulders. "I am truly sorry. In a way you were as much a victim as I was. You were wanting a beautiful Luna and got stuck with me. All your plans were railroaded by feelings that weren't really yours. Forced to go against your nature and wanting a guy." I stroked his thick dark hair, running my fingers through it to help him relax.   I meant to comfort him instead I started feeling how soft  it was and the gesture was more about comforting me.  I think at that point ever ounce of resentment I had for him dissolved.

"Your life is back under your control now. You can find the mate you always imagined. You'll have your choice of all the unmated Pure Blood females." I leaned in close and whispered, one guy to another. "Think of the fun you'll have getting rid of your virginity."

Damien stood up and pulled me close again.  "Do you think I should lose it to my true mate?"