243:drugs

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Trigger warning: Implications of rape, abuse, drugs...Tread carefully, I'm also no expert in these topics ;-; but I wanted to give you what I imagined in my head

Park Ha-Eun

"Court will come to order, please rise for the honourable judge..."

Her earliest memory of soulmates included the montage of her parent's voices ringing in her ears. The smash of broken glass on the walls, the slam of a car door and the cacophony of sound. They called each other names and words that she learnt from the corner of the room. It happened all the time, and at the very end her father would climb on top of her mother. A mixture of limbs, the stink of cigarettes and the guttural grunts from her parents, sweaty and raw.

Soulmates.

Did they know that she stood right there with them in her worn out panties full of bug holes and fairy prints? No, not when they were intoxicated from the powder that they sniffed off the table and exchanged with wads of cash. Not when their eyes were so dilated that they'd turned black, and they were shoving their tongues down each other's throats, pressing flesh against flesh, meat against meat, fluids against fluids.

Animals.

She didn't want to be like them when she grew up, and she vowed not to be.

"Your Honour, this is a case of abuse."

She decided she wanted to become a celebrity when she was four, right in front of the tele as she ate her microwaved dinner to a backdrop of broken glass bottles, ripped packets and green fuzz on the walls.

Her father had screamed dirty, bad words at the woman dressed in a glittering gown that Ha-Eun longed for. And her mother had grunted back words of poison and jealousy, of fake breasts and plastic surgery. Ha-Eun had stared at that screen and wondered why they would hate someone as beautiful, as clean and as pretty as the girl on the tele.

And she swore then and there that she wanted to be like her too.

Her parents were sent to jail when she was seven, and she was later taken in by her maternal aunt, a stoic woman who smoked so much that her voice was rough and crisp. She didn't have a soulmate, called those that did 'filthy animals', and Ha-Eun liked that about her.

Her aunt was her biggest supporter, and the only person in the world who truly loved her. It didn't matter if her aunt did get a little violent when she made a mistake at class, or if Ha-Eun wasn't allowed to have food on some days because she was growing too fat for the camera. Her aunt was the kindest person she had ever met, funding all her plastic surgeries and all her lessons. And she didn't hesitate to remind her over and over again that she had spent every penny of her hard-earned money for Ha-Eun's dream to become a star.

Her aunt was her first supporter, and the only person who gave a motherfucking damn about her.

Ha-Eun couldn't let her down.

She swore that on her grave.

"More evidence can be found in the USB I have given to your Lordship of the images, recordings and videos which have all of the multi media documents on which the parties rely on."

She signed on with a company when she was sixteen for wads of cash that nearly left her in crippling debt. They promised her a meeting with the 'investors' and a part-time job that would give her 'exposure'. She should have known what they were doing when she entered a hotel and was asked to go up on her own. She should have known when she saw another little girl just like her draped over an older man on the couch with a spread of glass bottles at his feet. But Ha-Eun was naïve and young.

Stupid.

And the sight of glittering rings, expensive suits and the thick smoke of rich cigar clouded her judgement when she willingly drank cold crisp alcohol from a glass given by one of the men. She wanted to be part of the rich and the famous, and so she let her guard down.

She woke up the next day with a cramping pain between her legs, an older man twice her age by her side and a splitting headache that made her guts churn with bile. But Ha-Eun was astute and shrewd from experience, and such things couldn't faze her, especially with the fear of her aunt's wrath. She woke him up later, the CEO of some company she didn't know yet, and threatened to post the pictures of his naked body and flaccid tiny cock on the internet unless he gave her what she wanted.

That was the very first time she blackmailed someone.

And that was how she learnt to rise to the top.

"So, you held the knife to your belly, intending to 'kill your child and yourself'?"

"No, I just held it there I had no intention to do that. It was just a joke."

"Ms. Park, you are lying about that, and I am going to explain to you how I can show that you are lying, but I will come to that in due course; all right?"

She met JieMi when she became famous.

A young boy with eyes like Bambi's, soft beautiful eyes that she longed to keep. She enjoyed his innocence and how he blushed and fumbled under her presence. She felt like a God when he bumbled and fussed over her. Sweet, adorable, pretty.

Surprisingly, accepting.

He didn't complain when she took his virginity, and she enjoyed watching his eyes blow wide with pleasure he didn't understand. She enjoyed turning him red with need, she enjoyed watching him panic. But what she loved the most was when he worshipped her feet. Oh, she fucking hated sex. It was disgusting, animalistic and so fucking primal. But it was also what gave her power and the power she had over JieMi had been euphoric.

He gave her whatever she wanted, as long as she agreed to be his 'girlfriend'. He was a ridiculous romantic who believed so much in soulmates that she wanted to puke. He was so young and so damn naïve, so stupidly protected from the darkness of the world that sometimes she wanted to clamp her fingers around his throat and see whether or not he would fight her, or would he let her kill him.

It was a thought she toyed over for a long time. And she tried to choke him during sex, an act that made him cry and get a little angry for a while for the 'surprise'. She laughed at him then for being the weakest boy she had ever met. He was so weak compared to her. So, so weak.

"And you have also, on your own account, become addicted to the prescribed drugs you were given?"

"My lord, the drugs are just something that idols use to c-calm ourselves down. We take it all the time, as given by our doctors, and I myself am very open to the drug culture. It's normal for me to give it to JieMi, just as it is normal for idols to consume it before a show."

The drugs were fun things she bought with her friends.

It made the world spin and sparkle like everything she owned. It made the world twist and turn, and the world would stop until there was nothing left but her and her mind. It was relaxation and peace that made even breathing feel like meditating on the top of a mountain to a blue sky and fluffy white clouds. It was a fucking full body orgasm for hours and hours on end, it was liquid pleasure flowing through her veins, it was fucking heaven.

It was escape.

She laughed when she got JieMi on it, enjoyed the way his beautiful eyes turned blacker and blacker and he would cry for help and then stop. But she fucked up when his annoying fucking members came knocking on her door for him. It took a while for her to get him normal again and she didn't know how the fuck to, but she made him drink gallons of water and vomit again and again until he was sick. And then she made him take alcohol and other things that would mess up the symptoms.

The sickness threw him and his teammates off.

But that gave her the idea of soul bond drugs.

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