The choices you made | Eric Coulter (Under Reconstruction)

x17. The stars are dancing in your eyes

"One choice can transform you-or it can destroy you. But every choice has consequences..."

Quite the usual ritual.
Eric and Eleanor didn't discuss anything on their way back to Dauntless.
She was exhausted and he was completely outraged by what happened, even though there was a facade on his face, as it always was.

If a person could die out of remorse, Eleanor would be dead now.
She wished things ended up today with her being dead, as she understood what kind of burden all this was to Eric.
He never spoke of it, but she was aware of what kind of pressure this was to his beliefs, his values, to everything he was.
But no matter who he was, and, by now, Eleanor knew faultlessly who he was, she felt as she was hampering him down.

They were never meant to happen. They were both conflicted with the integrity of the other, it seemed.
And the only distinction was that Ellie was younger, more flexible, and more open to suggestions.

Anyway, he never left her side after what happened.

Peter was sent to fill in the paperwork and the reports since he was officially held hostage by the refugees and she was left alone, so she followed Eric without a word.

At first, they were at the leadership courtyard, so he can leave some things there.
She helped.

Afterward, he took her for dinner and a long walk through the Pit, as nothing was wrong and nothing never happened today.
Still no talk.

With the words "let's go", Eleanor was quick to follow him to the Grounds so he can send the team to scout for the rebels. As soon as that happened, she was needed in the Intelligence to sign some paperwork, he followed.
Still no sound.

And finally, they went to Eric's apartment.
Without a word.

She went hastily for a shower, as she felt a need to wash away everything from today, but it seemed blended with her very sensibility.

And it was.

She could wash the dirt and the dust of herself, but she couldn't cleanse divergence with a shampoo.

One percent.
That one percent of her didn't agree with anything in the city she was raised in.
That one percent was separating her, in her head, from Eric.

Under the mild water, she even sobbed a little bit.
And, all of the sudden, she stopped. Being lost in the labyrinth of her senses was still a thing.

Afterward, he went for a shower too.

Meanwhile, she was quick to wrap herself in his t-shirt, sit on the sofa and stare at the half-full cup of water on the table he had left.

That t-shirt she wore was brand new when she found it.
He gave it up quickly after purchasing it because she was constantly speaking about how comfortable it was, so it ended up as her brand new pajamas.

Lately, it was the only thing that reminded her of him when she was lonely. And she was lonely a lot, because, whatever he did and wherever he was, she was not by his side. She felt deserted.

Soon after, he unhurriedly crawled out of the bathroom and sat on the armchair next to the sofa without even looking at her.

He was misplaced, but not because he killed somebody today.
Eleanor could only assume that Honis was not the only one, not today ...not ever.



"If you wish to surrender me to Erudite, I understand." she declared abruptly, but with a vacant expression on her face. Worst of all was, that she was truthful.