Chapter 19 - Sleep

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Henry woke up as the sun rose and I was staring out the window in a daze.  I didn't sleep at all last night.  

"Morning," he said, getting up.

"Morning."

"You sleep at all?" He asked.

"A lit-," I sighed, "No, I didn't." I needed to stop lying.

"I think mom got you some sleeping medication," he suggested. 

"I don't know.  I'll just end up having a nightmare.  I'm afraid to sleep."

"Hm, let me look it up," he took out his phone.

"Ok, here's something.  Good temperature in the room, you're not cold or hot are you?" He asked.

"No," I said.  This seemed pointless.

"Ok, pain could affect your sleeping.  Ooo, it says that the smell of rotten eggs or roses might help you have more positive dreams."

"Those are like the complete opposite."

"Rotten eggs it is," he smiled.

"Ew."

"It should be really dark when you sleep, no eating or drinking right before bed, keep a regular routine, therapy is a big one, talking about your nightmares or even just writing them down, ooo video games help."

"Video games?"

"We should play together after school."

"Maybe," I said.

He kept reading more things to help and Adam came in.

"Whatcha doing?" Adam asked us.

"We are finding ways to get Cassie to sleep better."

"Huh, anything good?"

"Video games and no smoking sound easy." Henry said.

"What about exercising or yoga?"

"Yeah those are on here, but those are boring," Henry said.

Adam shook his head and started eating breakfast.

Henry got up to eat and I laid down on the couch.  

Mom, Dad, and Eli came down.

"Good Morning boys, Morning Cassie.  Did you get any sleep?"

"No."

I closed my eyes and thought about my nightmares.  I put different endings to them to make them more positive like the website said.  It wasn't working.
I started crying quietly thinking about Kyle, George, Elliot, CJ, Evan, Robby.  Its too much.

Mom sat next to my head. 

"Here," she handed me my pain medication. "Here's the sleeping medication if you want."

I sat up and stared at it.  

I took the pain medication and held the sleeping one in my hand.

"Maybe just try it, and if it doesn't work we'll try something else, but for now you need sleep."  

I was terrified of my life like nightmares.  But I was exhausted.  I'm not even sure I could stand up at the moment.

I sigh, "Okay." And I took it.

I laid back down and closed my eyes really to sleep.  But also not ready at all.  Mom ran her fingers through my hair.

I listened to the boys get ready for school.

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