Reaching You

Chapter 31: Paige

I smiled to myself as I recalled the picnic that Ryder took me on. After eating, we played twenty questions which ended quickly as it suddenly started raining. It was hilarious to see Ryder shove everything back into the basket. He threw the blanket over my head and held my hand as we ran back into the packhouse.

Being with Ryder felt natural. Being with Ryder made me feel so alive. Every word, touch, the emotion was so much more with him. I could understand why my mother fell apart after my father's death. I was getting more and more greedy. At first, I wanted him to smile at me more but now I wanted his smile all to myself. It was getting so hard to remember why I needed to leave. Today was the sixth day. I was starting to think that I was fighting a battle that I knew I was losing from the start.

Ryder was busy talking to Chase on pack matters and I smiled fondly as I watched Ryder furrow his eyebrows in concentration. Louise taps my shoulder with a smirk on her face. "How are things going with Alpha?" She asks, giving me a wicked grin. I blush as I understood her underlying question. She laughs and says, "Just asking because Alpha's been in a good mood recently." I turned to see Ryder. I knew he wasn't the only one affected. "It's surprising to see the Alpha smiling." She continues, making me frown. He did smile.

Louise must have read my mind as she elaborates, "With his eyes." I nodded. It was true as his grey eyes seemed more lively. "Louise, I want to thank you for letting us have this week off. I know you and Chase are already busy enough." I say, looking into her eyes. She beams widely and shakes her head. "Anything for you and Alpha. We're practically family!" She states, making me grin. I feel a strong arm wrap around my waist and I turn to see Ryder. "Excuse us, I have something planned for us today," Ryder explains, giving me a secretive smile. I blushed as Louise cleared her throat. "Have fun. And make sure no pack members find you two in a compromising position!" Declares Chase, making Louise giggle. Ryder rolls his eyes and we head out.

Ryder was taking me to a garden that his father built for his mother. He had asked me to go if I didn't mind. I agreed as I saw the vulnerable look in his grey eyes. It made me feel uneasy. I knew that this garden meant a lot to Ryder. Ryder clears his throat and takes my hand in his. His hand is warm and engulfs mine completely. The garden is a mess, all wild and overgrown but there is something magical about it. Ryder takes a deep breath and laughs weakly. "I haven't been here since dad died." He runs his hand through his hair, making it stand up in multiple directions.

He takes me into a maze that has a small bench in the middle. He sits down and I sit down beside him. "Paige, today I want to explain why I rejected you." He says, calmly. I turn to face him to let him know I was listening. " When I was young, I had heard stories of how my parents met and how they were perfectly suited for one another. My mother's mischievousness and my father's strictness were balanced out when they were together. But I didn't understand as the public image of my parents' relationship didn't line up." He starts, his voice soft and I held my breath.

"My mother was beaten up every day by my dad and she would hide her bruises with long-sleeved dresses. My mother was becoming a shell of who she was. She lost the spark in her eyes. She was essentially waiting to die. I knew it. She knew it. He knew it." Ryder's voice is steady but I see the pain in his grey eyes. I take his hand in mine and give his hand a squeeze.

"She used to laugh off her injuries when she caught me looking. She used to say, 'Alphas are just too temperamental at times!' But a month after my 12th birthday, my mother left with my father knowing. He went mad. He would take out his anger on me but on my 16th birthday, I shifted early. I challenged my father and won. That's how I became Alpha." He explains. He looks at me anxiously and I nod to show that I was keeping up with his story.

"I promised myself that I would reject my mate because I didn't want to become him. So I rejected you but Elder John told me something that changed my whole view on my parents' relationship. He told me that my father made a deal with the devil to gain more power and in return, he sacrificed his mate bond with my mother. Foolishly, he believed that their mate bond was stronger than anything but he was wrong." Ryder states, frustration all over his face.

"I could blame my parents but it's not their fault. It is mine. I was weak and cowardly. I ran away from you. Instead of becoming a man that was worthy of your love, I decided to hurt you by rejecting you. Then I tried to convince myself that it was the best way. I took the easy way out. Paige, I'm sorry for hurting you. For leaving you all alone when you needed me." He says, sincerely. My eyes prickled with tears. Why did we have to go through all of this?

He opens his mouth to comfort him but I shake my head. "Just hold me please," I whispered, tears running down my cheeks. Ryder pulls me into his arms. I bury my face in his warm chest and I cry for my poor mate who had been so much. My heart ached for the man who lost so much.

Even after my tears dried, we just sat there on a bench in each other's arms in the middle of the worn-down garden.