back on track

22. the on where they spill some tea

I hadn't really talked to anyone since the plane. I had been little down with everything going on and to be honest I was afraid to face anyone. I had been working alone shutting everyone out like I intended to when I was feeling down. Even Cami and Nick, who were starting to get worried about my silence.

It was already Tuesday, and we were meant to head to Azerbaijan today. I had packed everything and was ready to go. I put on my headphones and left to the airport. I wasn't too excited about the fact that I would have to work along side with Carlos the whole week. I mean I loved the guy but I hadn't talked him since, well you know.

I had a bit busier schedule this week than I had had before and I was actually kind of looking forward to it. I had finally shown that I could take more responsibility and I was happy that the team trusted me enough to give me that. I flew alone for the first time since I had came here and it was oddly nice. It reminded me the times when I was younger and used to travel a lot alone.

My plane landed in Azerbaijan 10pm local time and I got settled in the hotel that I was staying before sleeping off the jetlag and getting ready for tomorrow. I wanted to be up early so I could go for a run possibly and still be early in the paddock and that's what I did.

At 6am my alarm went off and I crawled out of the bed. I was going to run before breakfast so I just picked up some training clothes and headed down.

"Hey Sof" Daniel caught up on me.

"Hey Dan" I mimicked the way all the guys shortened my name. It hadn't been a thing in Finland but here it had spread among the people quite a bit.

"How are you?" he asked. "Nobody has heard from you since last GP" he pointed out the obvious. I usually didn't really chat with any of them like daily but I guess there was always one or two guys I would be in touch in between the races just to catch up or if I had something to talk about, but this past week I had been on my own pretty much the whole time without contact to anyone. Not even Lewis who I used talk to at least once between the races. 

"I'm okay, just been busy" I lied to him.

"Yeah, okay" he nodded. "Lando's been a little down too" he pointed out and I realized that the two were teammates. "He's been talking to Carlos again and I think they are back being friends but he's been a lil worried about you" he continued as we walked outside of the building. Well, I walked he followed.

"Oh yeah, I haven't talked much to either of them" I told him. "But good for them" I added trying to smile.

"So what's going on with you and Carlos?" he dropped the question I didn't want to deal with cause I honestly didn't have an answer to it.

"Nothing much, we've both been busy with work and stuff" I told the guy.

"Well, I hope you sort it out" he said before saying bye and getting back to hotel.

--

I was walking around the slowly in the waking paddock greeting people I knew and looking around how everything was here. I found the Ferrari hospitality easily and walked up to the office to get my stuff and looked up what was going to be in my plate today. Youtube video with the drivers, track walk and some writing and photographing. Sounded about right.

The hardest part of the day was going to be the Youtube video I was supposed to film with Charles and Carlos. Charles had been checking up on me once in a while after the flight and Carlos and I hadn't really spoken to each other since. It felt weird cause usually it was the other way around. It's not that we didn't get along with Charles, but just that I worked in Carlos' team and our paths didn't cross that often. But since the flight I felt like we had grown closer and he had this big brotherly relationship with me even more than Carlos or anyone else in the paddock. He made sure I was okay and that I had everything that I needed not to even mention the protective side of him that woke up once in a while.