Her Mafia Brothers

Flashback

Thanks to @fiveofsix for the suggestion. I hope I did this justice :)

My bottom was on fire. But curled up in Jack's arms now, I was strangely content. His arms were so familiar to me. I'd probably spent more time in Jack's arms over the years, than anyone else's. Including my parents.

Jack's arms were stronger now than they'd been eight years ago, but they still felt the same. They way they wrapped around me, making me feel safe, like nobody and nothing could hurt me.

As soon as the strange men would arrive downstairs, or the fighting would start, Alex would gather us up and take us upstairs. Jack would always carry me because I was so frightened, and I'd cry, calling for mom. But mom ignored me. So Jack would hold me tight, whispering to me that I would be okay. He would look after me.

I snuggled against his chest now, remembering.

I was five years old again. Jacky was 16, and he was my hero. He wasn't as big as Alex or Damon, but he could carry me easily, and he did. He promised to protect me, and I believed he would. I curled my body into a ball. I could hear the screaming downstairs, the shouting. The bangs. Fighting. So much fighting. More banging. It was never ending, it went on for hours. I shook with fear and Jack tightened his hold on me.

"It's okay Carrie," he whispered in my ear. "It will be over soon, I promise."

"Make it stop," I begged.

He covered my ears with his hands to muffle the sound of violence from downstairs but it didn't stop the noise completely.

Jack sang to me, and tried to get my other brothers to join in, but they sat there in silence, their faces pale with fear. They were frightened, too. I wondered where Damon was. He didn't come upstairs with us, he stayed down there with daddy. He was part of the family business and he had work to do.

As long as I stayed there with Jack, curled up in a ball, I would be okay. Jack had promised me I would, and Jack didn't break his promises.

I was six. This time, Alex didn't come upstairs either. He was down there with daddy too, working in the family business, whatever that was. I didn't know, they didn't tell me. Daddy said I didn't need to worry my pretty little head about such things, and I would find out when I was older.

Nick, Rocco and Logan were sitting on the floor, their backs to the wall. A movie was playing in the background, meant as a distraction, but nobody was watching it. I don't think anyone even knew what it was. Rocco's hands were shaking. I snuggled closer to Jack. He was big and strong. As tall as Daddy, now. Jack wouldn't let anyone hurt me.

The bangs downstairs were different this time. They were louder, sharper. They sounded like gunshots. Why would someone have a gun in our house?

"Sshhh," Jack whispered, holding me close and reassuring me, but he was shaking, too. I could feel it. Nick's face was pale. He moved closer to Jack. Logan moved closer to Rocco. And they both moved closer to Jack. All of us huddled together, terrified of the commotion downstairs.

I buried my face in Jack's shirt. It smelled like the deodorant he liked to use. When he first sprayed it on, it made me cough. But the familiar smell in my nostrils now was comforting. It told me Jack was there, my protector.

"Hey," Jack called softly, giving me a shake. "Are you okay?"

I jumped, startled.

I wasn't six years old anymore. Jack wasn't a teenager. There was no arguing or fighting going on downstairs.

I let out a long, low sigh of relief.

I was home with my brothers, where I belonged. I was safe.

"Flashback," I murmured. "From when I was little. Just before Mom took me away."

"I wondered," Jack said. "You were trembling and whimpering, and curling yourself up into a little ball just like you used to do."

I looked up at him. "You remember?"

"Of course I do. We always had a special bond, me and you. You used to come and climb into my bed with me in the middle of the night, do you remember that?"

I thought hard, trying to remember. But my childhood memories were fuzzy. The trauma I'd endured over the years had blocked most of it out.

I shook my head. "I don't think so."

Jack smiled. "When you got scared in the night, either from a bad dream or thunder and lightning outside, you'd come and hop up in my bed and snuggle down under the blankets with me, pressing your little body close against mine, wrapping your little arms around my neck. If I didn't hold you tight enough, you wouldn't sleep."

There was so much pride in Jack's rough voice as he shared his memories with me, that I started to cry. To think I'd wanted to exchange Jack for Nick or Rocco as my favorite brother! My inner voice scolded. Jack has always been the one who has been there for me.

"I'm sorry Jacky," I whispered, guilt rocking through me.

"You've got nothing to be sorry for, sweet girl," Jack reassured me softly.

But he didn't know. He didn't know that I'd considered swapping him out for another brother who hadn't been there for me half as much as Jack had.

"Yes I do," I admitted, trying to stem the flow of tears with the back of my hand.

Jack looked at me, puzzled. "Why?"

"Because just before you spanked me, I decided you weren't going to be my favorite brother anymore. I was going to pick Nick or Rocco instead. Because they haven't spanked me. But they don't love me like you do," I whispered. "I'm sorry."

"Oh sweetheart." Jack hugged me tighter, and I could feel his chest shaking a little bit, like he was crying. Either that, or he was trying not to laugh. I wasn't sure which.

"You don't need to apologize for that, sweetheart. You don't need to feel guilty, you've done nothing wrong. It's not wrong to have a favorite, or to change favorites, or to have multiple favorites, or even to have no favorite at all."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes darling girl, I'm sure," Jack reassured me, brushing my hair back from my wet face. "But there's something you should know," he told me, and he sounded serious, so I looked up at him. "Just because you and I are close, doesn't mean your other brothers don't love you every bit as much as I do. They maybe just show it differently, and they've got different responsibilities. But all of your brothers love you, don't ever doubt that."

I wrapped my arms around Jack and snuggled in close to him. "I know."

"And also, just because you haven't been in trouble with Nick or Rocco yet, doesn't mean they will never punish you. I'm sure they will, if they need to."

"Oh." My voice was small. Well that ruined things for me a bit. I was quite happy thinking that the job of keeping me in line fell solely to my three oldest brothers.

"But do you know how to make sure they don't?" Jack asked.

I looked up at him, curious. "No?"

Jack winked. "Behave." He grinned at me. "If you behave, and follow the rules, you'll never be punished again, by anyone."

I pouted. "I don't like your idea," I grumbled. "And it's not my fault. Trouble always seems to find me. All by itself."

"All by itself, without any help?" Jack questioned, chuckling.

"Yes." I grumbled again. "I'm sweet and innocent."

Jack chuckled again. "Of course you are."