chapter 40

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I wake up feeling refresh. I sit up to look for Ryujin but she's not there and same with Eva. I quickly run downstairs panicking if Eva is okay. Ryujin wouldn't do anything to her, right?

I get confuse when I hear laughter in the kitchen. I see my mom, sister, and Ryujin laughing together. I look around and I see Eva in her high chair. I pick her up looking over to make sure she's not hurt. I look at the three people staring at me. My mom and sister are both giving me a dirty look but I don't care.

I walk to Ryujin and she stands up. I glare at her, "You have no right to take her without telling me! I was so scared, waking up and not seeing her next to me!"

I run back up to my room with Eva and I hear Ryujin call me but I ignore her. I lock my door and I don't think I can face Ryujin right now. Not because I'm mad at her but because I overreacted. I know she wouldn't do anything to Eva.

I expected her to come here right away but she didn't. She's probably talking to my sister and my mom about how crazy I am.

After about 30 minutes, someone starts knocking on my door, "Yeji, can you let me in? Let's talk."

Her tone in her voice makes me nervous. I don't think I've ever heard her that serious before.

I open the door and walk back to my bed without looking at her. I hear her walk in and close the door behind her.

"Yeji, I'm sorry" she says making me look at her. She's apologizing?

"I thought I was helping. She woke up early and you looked so peaceful so I thought I would let you sleep in but I didn't want her to wake you up so I took her downstairs. I didn't think about how you would feel waking up and your daughter is gone" she says.

She comes closer to me, "I'm sorry, Yeji. I won't do it again. Seeing the fear in your eyes earlier is making me feel so guilty. You don't fully trust me and I understand. You have a daughter and an unborn child to think about. You have to protect them first."

"I trust you" I whisper.

Ryujin smiles at me, "I think the incident downstairs shows that you don't and that's okay. I understand it's gonna take some time for you. I know you're trying your best to trust me. I also know that in the back of your mind, you're thinking about the girls that hurt you in the past and you're afraid I'll do the same thing."

She kneels down in front of me and takes my hand, "I also understand your hesitation of trusting me with Eva. Why you got scared this morning. We haven't known each other for long. I won't cross the line again."

"Why?" I ask.

"Why what?" She looks at me, confuse.

"Why aren't you mad at me? Why aren't you yelling at me for assuming you would do something to Eva? Why?" I start to feel emotional.

"Because you're a mother. I can't fully know what you're going through so I try my best to understand you. I don't know how much fear you were feeling earlier, I just know you were scared. Your anger towards me wasn't because of malice, it was because you were worried for Eva. How could I get mad at a mother for caring about their daughter?" She answers.

"I'm sorry for not fully trusting you" I finally cry.

She hugs me right away and I cry on her shoulder. She rubs my back with one hand. "You don't need to apologize. Like I said, I understand" she says making me cry more.

"I don't deserve you" I say.

"Hey, don't say that now. You deserve everything you want in life. If that includes me then you deserve me" she says while still hugging me.

I let go of her and wipe away my tears. She stands up and I see her grab her bag and her clothes.

"Where are you going?" I stand up holding her arm so she'll stop whatever she's doing.

"Don't worry. I'm not going home yet. Your mom says I can stay in one of the spare bedrooms" she says to me.

"Why? You don't need to do that" I frown.

"I think it's best if I do. This way I'll less likely to overstep when it comes to Eva. I'll still be here, we just won't sleep in the same room, okay?" She holds my cheek.

"I don't want that. You're only here for a short amount of time. I want to spend every second with you" I say.

She stands on her toes and gives me a kiss on my forehead, "I'll still be under the same roof as you. After today, I realized we were moving too fast. Someone needs to take a step back and slow things down or we might crash. We haven't even been on a date."

"Do you still love me?" I ask.

"Yes. Why would I stop?" She ask.

"Because I'm too much. I don't fully trust you like you said. You could easily leave right now and forget about me."

"Do you think I'm upset or mad?" She ask.

"Kind of" I honestly say.

"Yeji, I'm far from it. Do you know how proud I was when you yelled at me? That showed how much you care about Eva and how good of a mother you are. I'm being honest when I say I understand how you reacted. I love you Yeji and today just makes me love you more. Trust can take some time and I'm willing to wait until you can fully trust me" She continues taking her clothes and putting it in her bag.

"There's no way for me to convince you to stay here with me?" I ask, really not liking the idea of her sleeping in another room.

"Do you really want me to?" She ask.

"Yes. Please" I kind of beg.

She sighs and drops her bag, "Okay. Just tell me if ever I'm crossing a line."

I nod and give her a big smile showing her that I'm happy.

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