My Ghost Lover Is Too Annoying

10

Lack of Life;

Human beings might have some accidents. They would turn into ghosts before the end of their lives. They would wander beyond their bodies and perhaps watch themselves being pused into boilers and incinerated.

This all happened all of a sudden.

When the King of Hell made you die at midnight, you would not live on until the next day. Maybe you would die before midnight.

Before the end

of this person’s life

in this world,

the ghost officer would not take him or her to hell. Then, there was time for him to accumulate resentment and turn into a fierce ghost. There were truly cases like Zhou

Nan who was harassed by a fierce ghost and then successfully

escaped and survived.  As a result, there are

more and more wandering and wild

ghosts who disturbed human beings, and there would be a vicious circle.

Talents were bricks that were moved to wherever there was a new building under construction. Chen

Ming who knew all about Yin and Yang was the

most appropriate “talent”.

The salary paid to ghost

officers was the money needed in the underworld. What was paid to the living was merely merit. In a

sense, it could be called Yang Shou (years

to live). However, how long you could live was decided by how much Yang Shou you had accumulated and whether it could help you pull through disasters in your life.

At this point, Chen Ming suddenly raised a silly question: “Have you heard of the” Five Disadvantages and Three Deficiencies?”

Zhou Nan’s head shook repeatedly.

“Five Disadvantages: widowed man, widowed woman, orphan, the elderly without children, and the disabled. Three Deficiencies: money, life, power.”

Zhou Nan vaguely

felt that it meant a bad fate.

“This is the fortune. Since I know all about Yin and Yang, I can’t dodge  Five Disadvantages and Three Deficiencies. One day, one of them will befall me.

Zhou Nan’s heart pounded and he asked gingerly, “Do you know which one?”

“Life.” Chen Ming’s eyes dimmed, “Life deficiency, that is, short life.”

So… How long is your Yang Shou? Zhou Nan didn’t ask. The atmosphere in the room became intense.

Chen Ming also felt it and deliberately quipped, “My real name is Chen Xi and my Master asked me to change it. He named me Ming (life) because I am short of fortune. His tone was teasing and one couldn’t tell whether he was joking.

“You may rest assured that I can live for a long time. I just have to put you guys in small bottles and bring you home and wait for our Comrade Xie Bi’an. Then I can get merits and sustain my life.” Chen Ming paused and added, “Of course, sometimes it is his good friend Fan Wujiu.”

Zhou Nan had heard of the legend of the two.

In a nutshell, the story was —

One sunny day, the two brothers went on a trip. Halfway down the road, the sky was overcast and it was about to rain.

Xie said, “Wait for me. I’ll go home and get an umbrella.”

Fan said, “OK.”

“Wait for me here and don’t wander around.”

“Alright.”

So Xie trotted home to get the umbrella, and Fan stood dully under the bridge waiting for him.

Soon, the rain came down with thunder. As the rain poured down, the river flooded. Watching the water go above his ankles, calves, and knees, Fan didn’t move. He just stood there because he promised Xie to wait for him.

Xie was delayed on the road and it took longer to come back. When he arrived, the water level was already higher than a person, and the short Fan drowned.

Xie was so grieved that he hung himself.

Thus, Fan’s big belly was filled with water and Xie’s neck was pulled thin and long.

One after another, they became ghosts and entered the underworld. The King of Hell was moved by their brotherhood and appointed them as ghost officers. From then on, they dressed in black and white and became black and white fiends.

“Is this true?” Zhou Nan didn’t believe someone could be so rigid and kept standing in the water.

Chen Ming shrugged, “I don’t know. If you are curious, you can ask him a month later.  It can help you kill time during the trip.”

It was when Zhou Nan’s soul returned to the underworld.

Chen Ming reminded him of his death. It was only natural for people to feel sad when it came to death. He curled up his legs, folded them on his chest, and dropped his head, showing only his dejected eyes.

Chen Ming looked at Zhou Nan. The former squinted his eyes but said nothing.

He was familiar with this profession and wasn’t an ordinary man. He had long been indifferent to life and death and used to reincarnation. He had imagined countless times the day when his life was over. He believed that then he must be smiling at Xiaobai, who slowly approached with an iron hook in hand, “I have been waiting for you for decades, Xie Ye.”

In this way, perhaps Xie Ye would think him smart and sensible and no longer use the hook.

Chen Ming came back to his senses. The one in front of him was still sullen. He sighed and for the first time realized that he had said something wrong.

He wanted to say sorry but eventually didn’t. He lay down and covered himself with a thin quilt.