Year 18

-Chapter 23-

I can't deal with this again.

This time it's real.

Charlie's truly gone.

"Felisha," Kane's voice is laced with tears as he comes back into the doorway of the bedroom, "you have to come see this."

My wretched, devious heart allows itself to hope. Just for a second.

"Stand down," I hear the Leader's voice coming from the screen in the living room. "Did you hear me? I said stand down!"

There's genuine panic there in his words, a quiver, an uncertainty.

I look at the screen as I step back into the room, feeling my limbs go numb. I see myself on screen, Kane too. A dozen of us. Our faces on bodies holding guns poised at the Leader, at his men.

"Kane..." I try to form some coherent thought, but my tongue is heavy, sunken against the bottom of my mouth.

"They're the faces you use; the faces you know," a voice says, a chorus of voices, "but it's not just one or two people fighting anymore. This is the beginning of the end."

The aired footage goes blank, but not before the ring of multiple shots pushes through the speakers.

The News streams never go black. The Government cares too much for their ability to maintain composure, to keep up appearances to fool their people.

This was an attack they hadn't prepared for.

I hear Kane, giving me instructions, but there's a ringing in my ears, the taste of blood against my tongue.

"I've got Amelia," he's saying, "we need to go now. It's only a matter of time."

If it weren't for his hand in mine, pulling me along, I would be rooted in the same patch of carpet in the living room. His hand leaves my palm momentarily to access the closet, pressing to the sensor, rooting through items inside. There are two packs lying against the back wall. He slings one onto his shoulder before handing me the other.

"Felisha," his face is against mine, his words directly in my ear, "we have to go, now."

We rush out into the hallway, racing through the corridors, going to Kane's office.

"Take her," Kane says, handing Amelia over to me. "I need to go get Paul."

Paul. Of course. We can't leave him here.

"Listen," Kane tries to catch my eye, but my vision is blurry with fear, with tears, "I'm going to go get him, but I need you to take Amelia outside. Stay hidden. If you notice any sight of trouble, get out of here. Understand? I don't care if Paul and I are there or not, get to somewhere safe."

I want to ask him where that would be. Where could we possibly be safe? Instead I do as he says, holding Amelia close as we race to the tunnel in the office. Her cries echo in the room as I lower us into the tunnel.

I wait for Kane outside, humming quietly to Amelia. Her cries have turned to a soft whine, hiccups interrupting the soft sound.

I stay hidden, feeling my pulse keeping time in my neck. I had expected him to be out here by now. Ever whistling of the wind sends a jolt through my body, anticipating who could appear, who could come looking for us.

Images of the Agents, of our faces replay on a loop in my mind. Cullen, Andrew, had told me that there were people within the Government who wanted to take a stand, who were on my side. I'd believed him, but it had become like a hopeful whim rather than fact. I've seen it now, seen that change is upon us.