Dressed To Kill

Chapter 58- Love

hello my lovelies,

I hope you had a great day today and if not, I promise you there will be better times.

And now for the last time in this book:

Have fun reading and always remember that you are amazing and enough.

I love you, bye.

Amara Calvetti

It began as a whispering in the air and turned into a scream that echoed through the world as if it's taking every strength to ruin us. The clouds had looked like airy anvils drifting under the gleaming disc of sun. But now that we are here it's different as if the universe did that to accommodate to my heart. A sheet of rain passed over us and the sound intensified.

Remember when I once said I loved nothing more than a summer thunderstorm?

When I said it's the most beautiful thing the world could ever show us, the most perfect sound.

I was wrong.

It isn't the soft, sodden, swollen drops of spring we are hearing; it feels like the universe is mocking us, watching as if it wouldn't have known from the beginning that this moment will happen.

Summer thunderstorms aren't peaceful and breathtaking like I thought they would be. They are painful and describe us the most excruciating torture a human being could ever suffer from.

It's not a background noise that softly puts you to sleep, covering you in peace. Not when two people you have never imagined being without are only minutes away from being 6 feet under.

When you haven't talked to the man you love with all your heart in days because you both are afraid to suffer together, not wanting to give the other person more pain.

And it's not about not wanting to communicate with the other, or being afraid of judgement...no... we communicate with each other just not with words because opening our mouths would be too painful. It's too exhausting looking the love of your life into the eyes and watching them as their face morphs into something pain stained because of the words that spill out of your mouth.

So, no it's not a background noise that softly puts you to sleep when you are shivering from the cold that surrounds your heart. Not when you are taking in a deep breath thinking about the past, the present the future and everything you have to go through without a person you need to life. When you are only seconds away from saying goodbye to your best friend.

I walk to the podium that is hiding under the roof that was positioned there in case of raining.

Exactly like now.

I lift my head and look at the small crowd that is gathered around the closed double coffin to spear us the sight of their dead bodies. Or what's left of them...

Adriano doesn't look at me, instead his gaze is directed at them, huge bags under his eyes from all the restless nights he had. Just like the rest of the people he is dressed in complete black but what I don't miss is that he is not wearing his own gloves. His hands are covered with Darius' that he always wore on missions, his initials engraved in the soft leather.

He stares at the wood as if he has to fight back the urge to run there and lay in it so he could be buried with his brother. He doesn't cry, he just watches and what's so terrifying is that I have never seen him with less emotion in his face.

He looks so empty and I have no idea how I can fix his heart when the piece that he lost is gone forever.

He looks so different.

I see the little boy in him that is crying for the universe to make the pain go away.

I rip my gaze away from him.