Once Upon Online

chapter 60

"Yeji" I hear a familiar voice call me.

"Yeji!" I hear it louder now.

"Yeji!" I jump up, feeling confuse. I look around to see I'm in bed. What even confuse me is Ryujin is in front of me.

I grab her face, "Is it it really you!?"

"What do you mean? Yes it's me" she tries to talk while her face is being squished by me.

"Are you okay? You were crying pretty hard in your sleep. What kind of nightmare did you have?" She looks at me with full of concern.

"Where are we? Where's Eva?" I ask, looking around.

"We're back at the cottage. Eva is with my parents back at the house. You said it was okay. Are you okay?" She ask again.

"I'm okay now. You're here and alive next to me" I pull her in for hug.

"Alive?" She ask.

"My nightmare. You died and it was awful. It felt so real. I really thought I lost you. I didn't know what to do. Don't ever die on me!" I push her away and I smack her arm.

I didn't even realize how much I'm sweating and that I start crying again. The moment she sees my tears, she hugs me again.

"It's okay, Yeji. I'm not going anywhere. I'm here" She tries to comfort me.

I cry some more while she holds me. My dream felt so real. My heart still aches because of it. I hold on to her tight, afraid that this is a dream and I'll wake up to the reality of her being gone.

"This is real? Right? This isn't a dream? I'm not going to wake up and find you're actually dead?" I can't stop crying.

"It's real baby. I'm here. Maybe we ate too much chocolate at the bonfire" she tries to blame chocolate for my nightmare.

"Why are you blaming chocolate?" I question her still holding onto her for dear life.

"Because I need someone to blame for making you cry. Seeing you cry is honestly so heartbreaking for me. I know it's impossible because life is not easy but I will try my best to always make you happy and smiling" she gives me a kiss on my head.

I couldn't help but let out a laugh. "Stop it. I'm crying here and you're making me laugh" I say.

"Then I'm doing my job right" she pushes me away so she can look at my face.

I see her smiling at me and I smile back because I just love her so much.

"I plan on living for a long time with you. I plan to see you in a wedding dress. I plan to see you in our own home with our kids. I plan to wake up every day next to you. I plan to be just with you" She says with all sincerity.

"Promise?" I barely able to voice out.

"I promise" she smiles at me before hugging me again.

We lay back down while I cuddle myself into her. I keep trying to get closer to her even though I know it's impossible but I'm so afraid of losing her.

"Get some sleep. I'll be here" She says.

"I'm scared. I feel so scared to close my eyes. Afraid you won't be there when I open them" I slowly say.

"What can I do to help you?" She ask in her calm voice.

"I don't know. That nightmare really messed me up" Again, I try burying myself into her.

"I'm sorry, love. Do you want to go out for a walk?" She ask.

"What time is it?" I ask.

"I think 4 am?" She guesses.

"Is it safe to be out there? No. What if a car runs you over because it's too dark and they couldn't see you. Let's just stay here and just hold me" I panic.

This isn't good, I thought. I can't live in constant fear that something is going to happen to Ryujin every time she goes out. How am I going to handle this? Why did I have to add another issue for myself? What would I do if I really lose Ryujin? What is wrong with me?

"Hey stop that" I hear Ryujin say.

"Stop what?" I ask.

"You're overthinking or thinking bad thoughts. I'm okay. We're okay" she assures me.

"How did you know?" I ask curiously.

"Your breathing pattern changed so I knew that you're thinking not good stuff" she explains.

"How did you notice that already? We haven't been together physically that long. Combining when you were in Canada to now, it hasn't even been a month" I say.

"Do you think I don't hear you breathe when we talk on the phone and you start thinking bad thoughts?" She chuckles.

"Don't make fun of me" I pout.

"I'm not making fun of you. I'm just saying I try to pay attention to your quirks? If that's the right term I'm looking for, so I can be a better partner for you" She cheers me up.

"You're already the perfect partner for me, Ryujin. I've never loved anyone as much as I love you. You feel like a drug I'm addicted to and I would go absolutely crazy if you disappear" I sigh.

"You're my life, Yeji. The moment I fell in love with you, I knew you were it for me. I would spend my whole life serving you, Eva and our future kids, if you want more" she says.

"You know you don't have to serve me. We're partners" I say.

"I want to be able to give you and our family everything" she starts rubbing my back.

"You're all we need. Your health and well being will be enough for us. I want us to be a family as soon as possible. I don't want to waste more time not being with you. We don't know how much time we have in this world" I start choking up again remembering my nightmare.

I hope Ryujin gets the hint that I'm ready to move here with her. I want us to get married already and start our life together. I want to sleep next to her every night and wake up next to her every morning.

"We will but first you need to get some sleep. And I do too. I'll keep holding you so hopefully you won't get another nightmare. I love you Yeji. Sweet dreams" she kisses the top of my head.

"I love you too" I say. I close my eyes to try to sleep. I really hope I'll wake up and she's still next to me. I keep telling myself she's alive and well. She's not dead.