Chapter 28

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I tapped my foot repeatedly on the hospital floor, as I waited anxiously for a doctor to let me know when I could see my mother. As soon as I left work, I found myself coming here. I didn't think too much about it, it just happened. A lot of things seem to be happening like that today. It's all very spur of the moment thinking today.

"Miss Kwan?" I heard a voice say and quickly my head shot up, while my heart rate quickened at the realisation that I would be going to see my mother. "Your mother is waiting."

"Thank you, Doctor." I replied with a smile, giving a light nod. I waited a few seconds, hesitant to go in. But after taking a deep breath in, to calm myself, I stepped on into the room.

"Oh, it's you...." My mother replied, slightly disappointed, I noticed. "I expected your sister, when the doctor said my daughter  came to see me. What a....lovely surprise."

"Well, I guess I'm sorry to disappoint you." I said in response. I looked around the room, seeing an idle chair, which  I took and placed close to my mother's bedside, where she lay. "Unfortunately, the disappointment won't stop there."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" My mother questioned, as I took a seat. I took another breath in, collecting my thoughts. How do I go about saying this? Why am I not more prepared? "Oh please, keep me waiting, why don't you? Just because I'm at the hospital, that doesn't mean I don't have better things to do, you know."

"Mother, I came to ask....or request....inform you, about my soulmate bonding." I began, trying to put all of my thoughts into one sentence. "I'm here to ask that you stay out of it."

"But I'm your-

"I'm sorry, but I haven't finished." I replied in a small voice, hoping I wouldn't anger her. Though when I looked up to see her reaction, I was almost surprised to see her unbothered by my response.

"Continue, then." She stated, showing no emotion, not even giving it away in her voice. The image of my mother now, in front of me, it reminded me a lot of my childhood.

It was often that I found my mother in a similar state to this. If ever I wanted to tell my mother something that was on my mind, no matter how serious or exciting it was, her reaction was always something like this. It's funny how, after all these years, I can never quite get used to it. It may be because I still remember the times, a long time ago now, when it was different. When she was different. This was of course before the incident....

"After my last visit, I kept my promise to you. However now I realise how stupid of me it was to keep it, or even just to humour the idea of it." I began. "I don't think it was your place to ask that of me, and I'm here now to request that you refrain from doing so again."

There was a pause. Neither I nor my mother spoke for quite some time. I was honestly unsure of whether she heard me or not. Maybe I should repeat myself?  But when, eventually, she spoke up, I kept silent.

"I asked this of you, because I thought you would benefit from it." My mother finally replied.

"I guess I'm here to say that, I didn't." I stated. "It only made me fear this bond more. I shouldn't have to be as weary as I am, and I shouldn't have to be careful to the point that I don't even try to engage with my soulmate. I should be enjoying the experience. But because of your input, I haven't been."

"Don't make this my fault." My mother retorted, in a rather defensive manner.

"Well, you are partially to blame, yes." I replied, feeling myself getting slightly frustrated at her.

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