☔︎︎Chapter 26: Winter Break☔︎︎

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As a young girl, I imagined that If I lived near a beach I would never ever be home

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As a young girl, I imagined that If I lived near a beach I would never ever be home. My lungs wouldn't know anything of old leather couches, constant frost and vodka bottles they would only know salt air and hot sand.

I always told myself that one day I'd go out and I'm I'd see the world and the world was going to see me, and we'd look at each other and have a mutual understanding of sorts that we've waited for this moment all our lives.

We'd look at each other and we'd understand. And I'd never forget the moment in which I saw the world and for the first time, the world looked right back and saw me.

I was always little Nadya Vladmir, Russian princess and daughter of thou they deemed the most high in all of Eastern Europe. I was sheltered, rarely allowed a peek at the television, scheduled and planned out days, hidden from the public eye- so much so that then I did go out with my father pictures of me would sell to newspapers and news channels for thousands.

I knew that coming to Czechoslovakia that no one would recognize me, I was all grown up now and knowledgeable yet I lacked so much experience when it came to social interaction. My brothers were my best friends, I hadn't any female companions growing up and my mother was never any help.

When I got my first blood, it was my brother Nikolai who'd taken me along with one of my handmaidens to purchase cloth pads and explained to me that I mustn't be afraid, that this was normal. My mother after that was inclined to explain the bare minimum to me about the many wonderful things about the female experience.

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