S I X T Y - O N E

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t h i r d — p e r s o n — p o v
— trigger warning—
—depression/suicidal thoughts—

  Zac exhaled a shaky breath, he'd fucked up... again — they all had. He knew he shouldn't have eavesdropped, he should've listened to Jack and Alex, but he couldn't; he had to know what was going on inside Leo's mind. The pain in his voice when he spoke in the dinning room broke them all to pieces, and worried them beyond belief.

  He never meant to put Lily's needs above Leo's; he hadn't even realised he'd done so till after the fact. Most of Lily's abuse was visible, as was Jack's — he felt a strong sense to protect them. He wanted nothing more than to protect Leo as well, but depression is invisible— he couldn't see that Leo had scars beneath his skin, scars so similar to the visible ones that coated Jack and Lily's bodies.

Hearing that Leo had scared Lily upset him, it played on his mind throughout the entire evening; building up small feelings of anger — without him even realising it. By the time Leo had came home, Zac didn't look, he didn't listen. If he had; he'd have seen the boys red puffy eyes, he'd have heard the sheer about of hurt in this broken small voice — but he didn't — that was his first mistake.

  Following Lily hadn't been part of Zac's plan, he'd acted irrationally — desperate to know of his youngest brothers troubles. Breaching their privacy didn't take priority in that moment, he never thought of the heartache it would cause.

  Leo and Lily talking so freely about death numbed each of the boys to their core, they could feel their once warm blood run cold, goosebumps arising on their tanned skin.

  I don't think anything could hurt more than living — they each sucked in a harsh breath at that, the statement falling from his lips so easily, his voice filled with nothing but honesty and pain.

  Was this truly how bad Leo felt? They asked themselves. Had it really got to the point that their youngest brother didn't want to live? That he didn't see any reason to? Did the worry they felt for Jack and Lily blind them to see their own brother breaking — piece by piece, in front of their eyes?

  Their jaws clenched in anger listening to Leo repeat Adamo's words. They'd never be sick of him, they loved him, they were proud of him; they always have been, always will be. Nothing could change that for them, even without knowing it all — they'd never leave him, regardless of his actions.

  "I'm going to kill Adamo." Carter gritted out, harshly wiping the tears from his cheeks with shaky hands. The deep loathing for the man building stronger than he deemed possible.

  "We're done with him, Car." Zac placed a hand on his younger brothers shoulder. "That man is no family of ours, he hasn't been since the day he ran his mouth."

  "We need to do something Zac, this conversation... how Leo feels... this is beyond what I imagined." Grey told him, his voice shaky as his wet lips trembled. He'd worked with depressed kids before, but Leo's condition seemed so much worse than anything he'd ever witnessed.

  Zac nodded to his brother, his blue eyes filled with anguish, "I know."

Hearing Leo scream for Lily to shut up had pained them. They wanted to burst into the room and protect their sister — knowing she didn't like yelling, but — for once; they took on Lily's advice, they waited, they listened. A feeling of pride washed over them as they heard her comfort him, no sound of fear in her delicate voice. She was patient, she was understanding, she was everything they hadn't been. Everything they wanted to be.

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