I missed you

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Panic attack warning

Leo, Luca and Andrea have spent the whole day with me. Well, Leo and Andrea have, Luca looked like he wanted to be anywhere else. 

But all day long, I couldn't get my brother's face out of my mind. 

Has he changed?

Does he look different?

Will he be mad I didn't come and get him?

Those were the questions I was battling in my head. Each and every one of them making me more and more anxious for Theo's return. 

At the moment, Luca and I are sat on the couch, in total silence. Leo and Andrea left a few minutes ago, Leo to get snacks, Andrea to answer a phone call from Gio. 

It's awkward to say the least. 

I was staring aimlessly at the tv, pretending to watch the show that was playing, while Luca was sat at the opposite side of the couch, looking at something on his phone. 

But he snapped me out of my little daze as he turned to look at me, and I sat there, waiting for what snarky comment he had to say. All he's done today was be an asshole. 

"Why didn't you go get Theo with the others?" I wasn't expecting that, that's for sure. 

"I just-um-it's a long drive." I responded, beginning to get uncomfortable under his gaze. 

"You haven't seen your brother in months, and when you do get to see him, you don't make the effort to put in the journey? That's not very nice." That comment sounded more like Luca. But it hurt non the less. 

"Theo will understand." I muttered, placing a cushion from the couch in my arms as I held it against my chest. 

"Will he? I mean, his own sister never even visited him." He said, a smug grin on his face as he leaned back against the arm rest. 

I felt water begin to form in my eyes, realising that Theo must hate me now. But I still had hope that I would be wrong. 

"What you guys talking about?" Leo asked as he wandered back into the room, not looking at me or Luca as he started watching the tv. 

"Just a few facts." Luca said, making my stomach churn. 

Its true. I've been a horrible sister to Theo. When he was in the juvie in LA, I barely went to see him at the start. And as time went on, I stopped bothering to make the journey, knowing he had gotten into more trouble and the guards would send me away. 

"The others will be home in a few minutes." Andrea said as he stood in the doorway of the living room. 

With the news, Leo hopped out of his seat making his way to the front door, Andrea following after him. 

"Don't worry though little sis, I'm sure Theo will understand why you abandoned him when he went away. He won't think that your a bad sister." Luca smirked. Then he got up off the couch and went to Leo and Andrea. 

His words were like a knife being carved through my heart. Theo is not a forgiving person, there's no way he'll forgive me. 

My heart was pounding in my chest as I thought of all the different things Theo would say when he saw me. He'd be mad. Call me a bitch. A good for nothing sister. A bad sister...

He always told me it wasn't my fault.

That no one could've know what was going to happen.

But Luca just confirmed what I've been believing all along. 

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