Living Through You || Caspian X

Chapter 9- Never Alone

Love me tender, love me sweet
Never let me go
You have made my life complete
And I love you so
Love me tender, love me true
All my dreams fulfilled
For my darling I love you
And I always will
- Love Me Tender • Elvis Presley

Caspian had announced James to be left alone until further notice. The blonde King refused to change into human form when the others were around, when anyone was around. There was so much to hide from, and so many emotions to tackle.

     As soon as they arrived back onto the deck of the boat, and most of the crew put themselves to bed, James shut himself inside of Caspian's chambers. Only then, was he human again.

    He may have been physically human, but he felt so much like a creature still. The ghost of the chains around his wrists and neck felt constricting still. Though there was nothing there to hold him, but he tightening continued.

     The tears began to drip from his dark eyes. James couldn't help himself. He hadn't allowed himself to express all of the he needed to when locked up. Now, it was pouring out of him like a waterfall.

    Sobs racked his body, and he shook from the bed. His head hurt like it never had before, and his skin felt like it was burning. Why was he burning?

    James didn't know how long he was there, alone, crying. He couldn't have known. His eyes ached from the tears. His body pained from curling into the corner.

     Then, there was a knock at the door. There was only one person it could be, and because he knew, James tried to cover his face. He wasn't ready to be seen.

     "James."

     Caspian's voice hung in the air outside of the door. He didn't reply. James couldn't find it in himself to say anything. His state was worse than he'd have imagined, and that was all the more reason for him to hide.

    Though his arm had the time to heal, it only did so to a certain extent. There must've been some sort of infection, some sort of internal factor to stop the skin closing up. It would just become a scar, another one to add to the tally. Maybe one day it would be forgotten, never by a James, but by everyone else.

     After another short while, the door clicked, and the figure James had been expecting stepped in. He saw the blonde, tears in his face, gashes that wouldn't heal, and claw marks upon his cheek. That was his own fault, a moment he regretted dearly, and they would fade in time too. Everything faded in time.

    James could feel the shadow over him, it loomed, like a bad dream. But nothing about Caspian could ever be bad. He was the sort of dream that the eldest Pevensie wished for to rid him of everything bad.

    "James..."

  "Don't look at me." The blonde looked to Caspian's does, afraid to meet his eyes. "Please, don't look at me."

  The Telmarine crouched, and tried to find James' eyes. "Why can't I? You're beautiful."

  "I'm useless." He croaked. "And useless things are anything but."

  "You're not useless." Caspian insisted, taking James hands in his own, though it was a struggle with his reluctance. "You're anything and everything but. I've never seen anyone so passionate about being true to themselves and their morals."