It Wasn't Supposed To Happen

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Bondita didn't want to feel this way but she did. She was a little nervous was an understatement. His mouth so close to her left ear issued a warning like statement. She had been so confident a moment ago that he won't do anything to her. She had made a stupid declaration but he was a grown up. He knew she acted out of her mind. He must know. He knew her too well. But her faith shook a little as his palm on her waist rose a little up her back and down again. Making her shiver with...not excitement. That was sure. This felt different from last night. It felt something like the night on her birthday but it just was not as appealing. Maybe because today her heart was not in it. She had agreed only to prove a wrong point and it made it feel all wrong. Not his touch, no...never but the situation.

" I will ask you something Bondita..." Her whole body was stiff as a plank, scared of whatever he was going to ask. Was he going to ask for something from her? She was not ready. She clutched her eyes tighter, her face must show her fear. Did he not notice ? Will he still put forward his demand ? She could say no. Right ? Could she ? Right after she promised him the very thing, should she deny it the very next moment ? " And remember..." He continued as his right hand moved to her the back of her neck and left hand holding her tighter he pushed her more to himself, not a hair line of space between. She would not open her eyes for she was scared to look at him right now. She had felt him be this intense only a very few times. Maybe just twice and she still didn't know how to act around him while he himself looked so...out of his own self. " Do not answer stupidly Bondita. It will not end well for you." He was not just threatening, she knew. She tried to move away somehow foolishly wishing him to not notice her attempt when she felt him put a little pressure behind her neck making her too scared to go through her actions.

" Are you comfortable ?"

That was not what she was expecting to be his question but was glad he asked and without thinking she just answered her head still bowed, eyes still closed. " No..."

Bondita felt his hand drop the moment she uttered her answer making her take deep breaths again, her hand making its way to her heaving chest. And she did what she always did when scared. She collapsed resting her forehead on his chest by the sudden loss of energy. All fear had flown away from her body making her sway. And this time when his hand rested on the back of her head over her pallu while left arm supported her back, she felt relaxed. As if safe again.

" Are you alright now...?" He softly questioned.

" Y...yes..."

" Do you... feel it Bondita...?"

She knew what he was asking. The very diffrence so obvious. She wanted to run away from one touch to the safety of other.

" Yes..." She snuggled into his chest more. As if trying to tell him she understood she was wrong.

" Bondita..." He said stroking her head to soothe her quivering body down. He knew she was scared. Ofcourse she would be. She had said something she didn't even know the meaning of. " It's alright. It's me. Just me..."

Bondita could not over come her embarrassment. She knew she had pulled something nearly equal to her stunts she put up back when she was young. But today instead of asking him to put sindoor on her parting she had asked him to be close to her.
Without him actually wanting it.
Just because of her foolish stubbornness.

" Bondita I am comfortable with you. But what I think of , everytime I am close to you is...you." Bondita was again made realised of his lack of kurta as she placed her right cheek against his chest. How was this ok and him holding her neck was not ? She didn't know so much. " What you felt a few moments ago is... what I never want you to feel. That little voice in your head telling you to move back, praying that I would stop...I know it was there... I don't ever want you to think that. To make you hate my closeness even for a second, I don't want to do that. That is why I am so cautious. Think so much. Just so you don't feel that way ever. Am I wrong Bondita ?" She put her arms around him as she tried to say ' no ' . " Am I so wrong that I pushed you into making such a compromising promise ?"