Loveless Beauty (Completed)

Chapter XXXVII: Who was Behind This?!

When reality seems more beautiful than your dreamland, you don't want to sleep anymore. That's what I did last night, kept myself awake, staring at my dream that was sleeping beside me.

Before, I will never accept this. But now I don't want to deny. I for so long kept Gashmir in my heart. Wondering if I ever would have a chance with this handsome husband of mine. When married I was beyond excited to start my life with him. That he crushed so easily. Followed by my disliking towards him.

But for some time, I dreamt about my life with him.

Now that we are taking chances I can't be any more happy than I am. I stared openly, shamelessly, without a fear of getting caught. I want to live this moment with him beside me.

Softly caressing his face, I soothed his hair afterwards. He stirred in his sleep making me stop. What if he goes back to his rude self and kicks me out at this hour. I wouldn't be more humiliated. I gulped the insecurities, continuing what I was doing.

When Gashmir opened his eyes and stared with the hooded eyes, I stilled. No this can't happen.

However, when Gashmir encircled his arms around me, shifting me closer to him, relief washed over me. Placing a kiss over my hair he murdered, "Trouble falling asleep?!"

I closed my eyes, reeling in the sweetness of the moment. This isn't a dream, right? Gashmir kissing me, showing his care for me, hugging me to sleep. Letting me sleep beside him on his bed.

"Keya?!" When Gashmir called, I found him waiting for my reply.

"No. Just assuring myself that this isn't a dream." Without thinking, I mumbled in his chest, hugging him tight. Uh?! Why do I feel shy suddenly?!

His chest rumbled as he chuckled. And that made me even more flustered. I wasn't meant to hear. Talk about thinking aloud.

I felt disappointed when Gashmir untangled me. However I didn't get a chance to weep when I felt my lips embraced by his. The senses alert, I feel surrounded with desire. Excited for him I not only returned the kiss but my feelings with the same fervor.

Gashmir stilled and stopped kissing. I stared at him as he closed his eyes. In the middle of kissing he moved above me. When he opened I knew the moment was gone and Gashmir has his distant look in the eyes.

Wordlessly, we kept staring. High on emotions, breathing heavily and with roaring hearts that keep begging to stop this childish act and be an adult.

"We should sleep," Gashmir breathed out, maybe, after realizing where our actions were leading to. But mostly to detach himself away.

I pushed him and turned my back as tears didn't wait to waste a second and fell continuously from my eyes. I got rejected twice on the same night. Is this how it always will be?! Warm and cold. Weren't we the same before we decided to give us a chance?! What's different now?!

I heard him sigh before he pulled me towards him, again. I fought to give in so easily, thrusting my arms and legs, aiming for him to leave me. Taken for granted was the last thing I wanted from Gashmir.

He turned me around and I slapped his chest away, sobbing uncontrollably. He didn't stop my assault for some time as I cursed him, "You are a jerk. I knew from the start, still I believed in giving you a chance. You idiot, selfish, narcissist, what you think of yourself. I will make sure that you will regret when I leave your___"