My secret lives

Chapter 12

The extractor fan gets activated by the so called humidity in the room which starts to go away taking the pot smell with it.

Soft tears stream down my face but no sound escapes my lips.

I deserve this

I deserve this pain

———

My mind is calm, numbness fills my head.

The physical pain is still there but it's okay.

It doesn't matter because my mind is okay.

And when my mind is okay, I'm okay.

I sit there on the ground, the ecstasy running through my body and soul.

I close my eyes and enjoy this feeling.

I don't worry about everything.

I don't worry about the mafia.

I don't worry about the pain.

I don't worry about the fact that my brothers might leave me.

I don't worry about the fact that my brothers probably don't like me or that they'll hate me when they find out.

I don't worry about the fact that my injuries could brings terrible consequences to my health and body.

I don't worry about going to that doctor, I don't worry about anything.

I just sit here and know that I'll worry about all those things later.

———

A knock at the door pulls me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah?" I call out still a little dazed.

I feel so floaty.

"We'll be leaving to go to the doctors office in half an hour okay" the voice says.

"Eeuuuhhhmmmm no" I disagree while circling my hands in the warm water.

It's so weird you know.

My hand floats without me even doing anything.

When my hand is in the water I don't notice that it's wet but when I take it out I do.

It's so strangeeee.

I chuckle a little under my breath.

"Athena" the voice says now in such a serious voice.

I laughs like an actually half dying laugh.

"Are you okay?" The voice now asks when I lose my balance because of the laughing and I let my head get thrown back which causes my head to bang against the bathtub.

I start laughing even more.

What's wrong with me

"Yeah" I say dazed when I finally stop laughing.